“Some birds are not meant to be caged, that’s all. Their feathers are too bright, their songs too sweet and wild.” – Stephen King
Being in love with someone is one of the most beautiful feelings in this world. Too often, we are ready to give almost everything we have to be with the one we love. We are ready to sacrifice our sense of righteousness and even our dignity, only to have an assurance. Though, there comes a time, when we need to ask ourselves how much is too much?
It might seem like a game to a lot of people. They don’t give away a part of themselves without getting something else in return. If they are not ready to learn the dynamics of love, it is high time you understand what being in a relationship really means, instead of making those irrelevant sacrifices. You need to make them understand that it is more than just a game.
Suggested read: 23 simple ways to love yourself every single day
Being in a relationship with someone is supposed to be a good thing. Your partner is expected to bring out the best in you by being your support. You don’t have to let go of the things you love just to be with them. These are a few significant things that you should definitely not let go of just to be with someone. No one is more important than your happiness after all!
1. Your self-worth
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This is something you should never compromise on. Ever since I was a kid, my parents told me never to settle for anything less than I deserve. It took me a while to realize that by “anything” they meant my to-be partner. If you know you deserve better and can be with someone who would understand you in the most effortless way, then don’t hold yourself at all.
The moment you need to compromise with your sense of self-esteem, you lose one of the most significant parts of yourself. There would come a time when you won’t be able to face your own reflection in the mirror because there would be nothing left in you. Your self-esteem and pride is the most important thing in this world. It can take years to build and only a few seconds to lose.
2. Your friends and family
“Family is not an important thing. It’s everything.” – Michael J. Fox
You could be dating your significant other for the last few months (or years), but they can never replace your friends and family. While boyfriends might come and go, your best friends would always be there by your side, helping you move on from the most unforgettable breakups.
Your family is something that no one can really replace. If your partner can’t respect your loved ones, then you certainly need to ask yourself a few questions. Can you really spend your whole life with someone who won’t give your parents the respect they deserve? Can you alienate yourself from your friends for the rest of your life to be with someone? The answer would be loud and clear!
3. Your dreams
“The only thing that will stop you from fulfilling your dreams is you.” – Tom Bradley
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Sometimes, love can really blindfold us. You might agree to let things go to be with your partner. Trust me – it might even seem like the most feasible thing to do. You might feel right by giving up on your dreams for a moment. But just because it feels right doesn’t mean it is the wisest thing to do. After a while, you will realize the price you have paid in order to be with your partner.
Your partner should encourage you to chase your dreams. You can never really let things go, especially your hopes and aspirations to be with someone. This is one such decision that might haunt you for the rest of your life.
4. Your idea of love
Deep within, we all have this idea of how love is supposed to feel like. No matter how much we try to hide that feeling, it is something which grows with all of us. We all like to be loved and have a fulfilling relationship. If your partner is not able to make your dreams come true, then you need to question the mere existence of your relationship.
Yes, getting a fairy tale romance is an exception, but there is nothing wrong with aiming for a realistic relationship as well. If they are not able to make you experience unconditional love, then maybe it could be a good thing to let go of them.
5. Your personal space and freedom
“Hope for love, pray for love, wish for love, dream for love…but don’t put your life on hold waiting for love.” ― Mandy Hale
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Too often, people get over-attached to their significant other and cross the line. If your partner is not able to give you the space you need, then you would never be happy in your relationship. You will soon be suffocated and everything about them would make you despise them in the long run.
You don’t have to give away your freedom just to be with someone. You are complete and whole the way you are. No relationship can be more important than your freedom.
6. Your inner peace
“Two things you will never have to chase: True friends & true love.” ― Mandy Hale
If you have to explain everything to your spouse and always need to put them ahead of you, then you are certainly doing it the wrong way. This will cause a chaos inside you and you would lose your mind.
Never lose your calm to please your partner. Yes, we all fight with our significant others and every relationship has a rough patch. But that’s the thing, it comes as a phase. If you are spending all your time simply worrying about your relationship, then you certainly can’t enjoy the beauty of it!
Suggested read: 15 amazing things you MUST do when you’re single
7. Your passion
“There is no passion to be found playing small – in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living.” – Nelson Mandela
Our passion is one such thing that keeps us motivated and driven. Yes, relationships are pretty demanding and you might have to let things go to make it work but when you slice off a chunk from your passion, that will be a short-lived phase. You can’t simply forget about it and pretend that the artist in you never existed.
Without having any passion, you won’t be able to get in touch with your creative side. You would only be living without really having the essence of it. There would be no sense of joy or passion in your life anymore.
8. Your ability to make decisions
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Knowing the difference between what is right and wrong is one thing, and getting a chance to make your decisions is a whole different story. If it is your partner who is making all the calls, then there won’t be any need to apply your brains. You would be merely following everything that is already decided by your partner. Being in a relationship like that can never make you happy.
9. Your conscience
“If you don’t know what you want, you’ll never find it.
If you don’t know what you deserve, you’ll always settle for less.
You will wander aimlessly, uncomfortably numb in your comfort zone, wondering how life has ended up here.”
― Rob Liano
Without the ability to make your own decision, you will gradually lose your conscience. This is where you need to make your mind. Are you really willing to sacrifice your righteousness to be with someone? Is it really worth it?
10. Your individuality
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We all are unique in our own ways. There is just something about you that sets you apart from everyone else. The moment you are able to let things go- those that make you so special, you would stop being yourself. That “something” is your individuality. It makes you who you are. Keep holding on to it, else you would be lost in limbo.
11. Your values
“The moment you start to wonder if you deserve better, you do.”
You are a product of all those past years when you learned new things from your parents and teachers. Your values make you who you are. It defines you in the most unadulterated way. You can’t compromise your values to be with someone. The mere thought of it is pretty hard to comprehend.
12. Your happiness
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At the end of the day, we all want to be with someone to be happy. The idea of marriage or any relationship is to attain happiness. If your partner is not able to make you feel happy, then there can’t be any other reason to be with them. It can never be worth it.
“Ten years from now, make sure you can say that you CHOSE your life, you didn’t SETTLE for it.” – Mandy Hale
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If you are willing to give away your passion and your conscience just to be with a boy or a girl, then you will stop being yourself. You would be just a compromised version of yourself. Yes, we all need to make a few compromises in love, but it doesn’t mean that you have to be a whole new person to please someone. The next time you fall in love, make sure you do it the right way!
Featured image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License
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