A relationship takes up a lot of your mind space and it generally makes you a happier more loving person. But sadly, when your boyfriend is mad at you, you life seems to fall apart. The problem is not only about him being mad, but also that you start to think about all of the other hasty mistakes that you do not want to make in the relationship moving forward.
It doesn’t matter which stage of the relationship you are in; you almost never know what to do when your boyfriend is mad at you. It is one of those questions that totally depend on the specific situation you are in, but here we are going to give you a bunch of general tips to make the situation better.
Suggested read: A step by step guide on how to apologize to your boyfriend
Remembering that we do not exactly know what your situation is, look at these possible solutions for what to do when your boyfriend is mad at you, and ensure that you choose the one that suits you best:
1. Understand why he is mad at you
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When your boyfriend is mad at you, you might be trying to do all the wrong things to fix it. You will have to ensure that you have an idea of what has gone wrong and then decide on a solution to fix it. Using the wrong solution to fix the wrong problem is only going to lead to more and more friction between the two of you.
There are many ways to do this. You can observe his behavior and base your conclusion on that. You can also ask his friends to help you out with the situation. Or actually talk to him and try to gauge what is going on through casual conversation. One thing you should never do is breech his privacy and try to understand the reason for him being mad at you when he does not seem ready to talk – this is going to trigger further anger.
Sometimes, in this process of discovery, you might end up saying and doing the wrong things over and over again. And lady, this is not going to be of any help to you in the future.
2. Look at it from his perspective
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Sometimes you know why he is mad at you, but you do not really agree with his reasoning for it. Many times, you think it is stupid and petty. I assure you, this happens very often. But you will have to look at the situation from his perspective, step into his shoes and understand why he is getting mad at you.
When he is mad at you, you will have to understand that you are not the only one in his life. Before you came along, he has had a lot of experiences and other people to deal with. It could be the repetition of an experience that he has had in the past and it is okay to talk to his about it. But ensure that you take into account his personality and then think about what he is going through. This is going to give you a better perspective.
3. Apologize
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A simple sorry can make things much better. The eternal question of ‘what to do when your boyfriend is mad at you’ sometimes has a very simple answer – say that you’re sorry. This makes all the difference in the relationship. If you have messed up a situation and you apologize for it, he is only going to love you for acknowledging your mistake.
This apology is also going to strengthen the bond that the two of you have and will make things so much better. This is the ideal solution to most things, unless you two are in a really complicated relationship and the apology doesn’t work on him at all.
While you make the apology, you will also have to emphasize that you understand the impact of the situation and that you did not want to cause him pain. If you have a logical reasoning for the things that you have done, then it is the best to explain it to him. Ensure that you assure him that you are never going to repeat it.
4. Don’t panic
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Well, a fight doesn’t mean a break up. Understand that. And keep reminding yourself that. He is only mad at you; he doesn’t love you any less. Just because the two of you are going through a rough patch, it doesn’t mean that you are going through a break up.
Before you start to panic and build stories in your head, you need to calm down and keep in mind the fact that your panic is not going to make anything better between the two of you. You will only need to focus on fixing the issue without thinking of the possibility of anything worse happening.
Suggested read: 10 unhealthy relationship patterns that will destroy your marriage
5. Get him to smile
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If you can get him to smile at you by being cute or naughty, you should do it when he is mad at you. This is going to lighten the situation and then you will be able to ensure that he gives you some lenience.
If you try to deal with him when he is sulking or screaming at you for something, you are not going to be able to talk to him. Also, if it is actually your fault, you might be in a really harsh talk. In these cases, avoid trying to calm him down with humor; accept the lecture and move on.
6. Wait for him to calm down
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Well, no one functions correctly when they are angry or sad. They need to normalize and be in a calm state of mind to sort out issues and make the right decisions. Understand the mood he is in, and then talk about the situation.
Even when you are not wrong, it is most likely that you are not going to be able to explain that to him when he is predominantly angry. Wait for him to calm down by letting him vent to you and then talk to him about the issue. There is no running away from talking about the issue, so you will have to ensure that you do it at the right time.
7. Do the things that he adores
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Well, you might be done apologizing and you two might be on great terms, but a few things need time to pass. To make this time go by easier, remind him of all the reasons he has to love you. You cannot do this by just telling him these things; you will have to show him feel that he is loved.
Take him out on a date, plan a good weekend or simply send him a random cute message during the day. Do not overdo this because you do not want him to know that you are doing it to undo the harm that you have caused in the relationship. There are always phases in the relationship where the love is at its peak and all you need to do is to recreate that phase. It has to look and seem natural, both for you and for him.
8. Do not press and irritate
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Men do not like nagging women. Simple. When you have asked him why he is mad at you or you have apologized and he is not responding to you, you need to let him be.
Sometimes people need their time to really process a situation and react to it. Most men are not impulsive and are not going to give you a reaction immediately. Understand this and ensure that you do not indulge in the nagging, pressing and irritating.
Suggested read: 10 things that men want in a relationship
All of these are possible solutions to the biggest problems that women have. When their boyfriend is mad at them, their world comes shattering down for a while and it takes a while for them to recover from it. As a woman, you need to understand that it is not the end of the world or even of your relationship. It is only a minor problem, which can be easily fixed by following some of these simple steps on what to do when your boyfriend is mad at you.
Good luck!
Featured image source: Dollarphotoclub
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