I am not married. Heck, no! But I certainly am friends (despite!) with those who are. Not everyone’s perfect, eh? 😉
However, you would be utterly mistaken if you thought these guys were living at the brink. There is another sub-bunch to this category that goes a step further, even though already 6 feet from the edge: the people planning their own wedding!
Reasons why they are wedding planning by themselves:
- “This is something so personal how can I let a stranger plan my dream wedding?!”
- “It would be fun” (?!?!?!)
- “I love research and organizing things!”
- “I always wanted to be a wedding planner!”
But the most important being (remember whatever comes after “but” is the truth!!)
- A wedding planner is f*cking expensive!
Suggested read: 7 essential things to know before hiring a wedding planner
And hence they embark on their highway to hell! In the beginning, they do have their sh*t together. They even think they are enjoying it! But after a week, all they get is stymied!
Let’s have a look at only 12 out of a million such annoying things wedding planning brings their way!
1. Organizing yourself
Image source: chariswoodward
Firstly you need to buy a wedding folder. This is supposed to hold all your receipts, agreements, bills and every other paper you are given in the course of your wedding. In just 3 days, you’ll realize that this one’s not enough. You need 6 more. In a week’s time you will have a pile of files in one corner of your apartment and you think if you should buy a chest of drawers for these records!
2. Finalizing the budget
Image source: Tumblr
…Then add another 14 lacs for your real budget! Add another 14 if it’s a destination. Add another 14 if all your relatives are coming!
Wait patiently (read eagerly) for your guests to make generous contributions to your ‘wedding trust!’
3. Creating the guest list
One would love to include only people who bring gifts. Preferably, gifts in cash. But that’s not possible. You can’t invite the people you want to. It’s your wedding? So???
4. Confirming the guest list!
Image source: Tumblr
You have to call that cousin who is superb in guilt trips. You have to call that Mama who’ll get wasted and misbehave. (Nah, the misbehaviour doesn’t matter. But that fish is going to drink up half of the alcohol!). You’ll have to invite “His” side of the family too!!!! FML
5. The bridesmaids’ dresses
Despite your research and inquiries, you are sure to end up choosing a hue and material that no one will be happy about!
6. Reserve inessential equipment
Image source: seventeen
Like a WiFi card for your aunt who cannot be physically present (God save you) at your wedding but has demanded a live video streaming of the whole shebang!
7. Booking hair and makeup
Why? Of course! It will cost you more than 10K per person to transform each member of your family into a Kardashian sister!
8. Booking dancing lessons
Well, you grew up watching KJo movies and this is just a knock-on effect! In the beginning, you will be laughing your heads off about how puerile you look dancing to Bole Chudiyan. Soon you will be overcome by the terror that everyone’s gonna laugh their *sses off about the same thing!
9. Squabble with your fiancé (regularly)
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And about everything! About why the cards are golden but not as golden as you wanted them to be. About how the wedding’s killing the spark between the two of you. About how hungry you are. About how you found him sleeping while you were arranging the flowers in parallel! Basically you will pick fights without any reason. Eat some cheese, GODDAMMIT!
10. The vows
If you are a writer, sorry to say this but buddy, you are f*cked!
Pro tip: It happens for the pun of it, I know, but please avoid puns! 😉
Suggested read: 15 questions to ask a wedding planner before hiring them
11. Whiten your teeth!
Image source: Giphy
Half an hour into your 2 hour treatment, you’ll realize that your teeth is too sensitive to this whitening product. You brave it anyway because what’s beauty without a little pain, eh? Wake up the next morning with the caterer asking you to taste all the afters, but your ‘fangs’ are irritable AF!
12. Tying the knot
Too tired coz of the blood (courtesy those bemused shoes!), sweat (blame the April sun), and tears (the guilt is to be blamed) you shed planning the thing!
Well, it’s not over! Because somebody’s gotta be planning the honeymoon?! 😉
Featured image source: jezebel