If you’ve ever been in a serious relationship, whether it was a longstanding affair or a proper marriage, chances are you may have had the misfortune of breaking up with your loved one. To call such situations devastating would be an understatement. But having said that, remember that life eventually has a way of catching up with you in due time. No matter how much pain you might be in right now, the best thing to do is put your pain behind you and start life afresh. This is of course easier said than done, so to help you deal with the heartbreak we’ve compiled a list of things you could do to not only combat the pain but also start life anew. Here goes!
1. Face the facts
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The first thing to do is to face up to the simple but hard fact that your relationship is over. There is no way of going back – not that going back is such a great idea, anyway. Owning up to this heartbreaking truth is the first step towards recovery, because once you get this into your head, you’ll start thinking of alternate ways of getting on with your life.
2. Make a clean break
Similarly, one mistake that most people make is trying to cling on to a relationship that is definitely over. It’s always sensible to accept that the relationship just isn’t working out for whatever reasons, and refusing to do so would only make you lose mental and emotional stability. The more you delay the farewell, the more painful it will be for you. Cut off all contact with your ex and get on with your life.
3. Spend time with friends
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Good friends are one of life’s greatest blessings. Take full advantage of people who care about you – confide in them, spend quality time with them, and try to be positive. For this of course, it’s also necessary to stick with friends who are in a positive frame of mind and who can cheer you up. Those with a naturally brooding tendency should be avoided at this phase.
4. Rely on your family
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Your family is the unquestioning support system that you can rely on during times of crisis, and a breakup is no exception. If you have strong family support, make the best use of it. Be it your parents or your siblings; let their gentle, loving care wash away your pain. Discussing your life with your family will help you cope with the situation. If you live away from your family, you might want to visit them or call one of them over to spend some time with you.
5. Pursue your hobbies
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Most of us are fond of certain activities outside work, but being in a relationship sometimes leaves you little time for these hobbies. Once you’re single, try getting back into your favorite pastimes again – your natural inclination for them will keep your mind occupied and help you forget your sorrow.
6. Embrace music
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For those of you interested in music, use the medium to heal yourself if you’re going through a breakup. There are few things in life as soothing and healing as a fitting tune. Go out with your friends and listen to a live performance; if you play an instrument, then practice it. A word of caution – avoid music that may evoke undesirable memories, as that might aggravate your situation instead of helping you.
7. Exercise
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As illogical as it seems, one of the best ways of dealing with a breakup is to exercise. Many lovelorn folks stop looking after themselves and forget about eating and exercising properly, sending them in a downward spiral. Exercising is not just good for your physical health; it releases endorphins in your body, which reinforces positive energy. Try to create a motivating environment for yourself by building up an exercise pattern with a friend or at a gym with the help of a trainer. This will help you stick to a focused routine and take your mind off the pain.
8. Traveling
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Traveling can be another great way of dealing with a breakup. Whether you’re traveling with friends or alone, just the change in scenery takes your mind off things and makes you concentrate on your new destination. Take off to places that you’ve always wanted to see, and engage in interesting activities that keep your mind off your emotions. Whether it’s enjoying the culture of the place or trying a local delicacy or even just enjoying the warm sand between your toes as you listen to the soothing waves, just let go of all that is negative and in the past, and look towards a new beginning.
9. Introspection can be good for the soul
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While keeping yourself busy after a breakup is an excellent idea, take time to reflect on what went wrong too. Although this might be done after you’ve given yourself enough time to grieve and come to terms with the end of the relationship. This introspection need not necessarily bring up painful memories, but it could help you heal by reminiscing the good times and also realizing what caused the breakup. If you’re not too fond of being by yourself, you could always try going for a walk in a park or sit at a café with a book and mug of hot coffee to keep you company.
10. Map out your future
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One of the most useful activities that can help you deal with a breakup is to imagine your own future a few years down the road. Mark out certain projects or achievements that you want to see yourself accomplish. This will help you not only get over your emotional struggle, but will also give you a new purpose in life.
A break up is never easy no matter which side you are on. But remember, what doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger – it will take time, but eventually you will be able to stand on your own two feet and move on to bigger and better things.
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