Every once in a while, it’s normal to feel down, because you’re a human being and you go through ups and downs, highs and lows in how you feel and act. However, constant negativity isn’t healthy – emotionally or mentally. Feeling low most of the time may be a consequence of having low self-esteem. This can have a significant impact on almost every aspect of your life, including your work, relationships, and your health. So how to improve your self-esteem?
What you need to understand is that high self-esteem stems from high self-worth. That is, it has to come from within you. This needs your constant, proactive effort to build from the inside out. There are many different yet little and easy ways on how to improve your self-esteem, but they work only when you’re consistent in your effort. Not doing your best once in a while is okay; you need not have to beat yourself up over it.
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If you have low self-esteem, try these tips on how to improve your self-esteem that are sure to be helpful in elevating it.
1. Have a vision.
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Close your eyes and picture yourself in the future, say, 5 years from now. What do you see, who are you with, what are you doing? Is the picture hazy, or is it clear? Form an image of yourself as the confident, badass, self-assured person you’d like to be. More often than not, the roadblocks and the hurdles you see before you are purely mental ones. If you really believe that you can be the confident, self-assured person who has awesome self-esteem and self-worth, then that’s exactly who you’ll seem to people around you as well. It all starts with your mindset.
2. Set realistic, achievable goals for yourself.
You may have many dreams and you aspire to be and do so many things in your life. However, just having dreams and aspirations isn’t enough; you have to do something about it. Getting one step closer to them is by setting yourself realistic, achievable goals for yourself, with a specified time frame. If it helps, write down all of your goals, the time frame you’ve set for yourself, and what are the hurdles you think you’re facing. Such a list works for both day to day actionable goals, and long term ones that will impact your life in general, too. Besides giving you a target to hit, it will make you feel good about yourself once you’ve ticked this off your list.
3. Have a plan and follow through.
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Once you’ve set goals for yourself, the next step is to have a plan, a roadmap, if you will, that will guide you through to your goals. Planning all the details involved will help you keep your eye on the prize, with no room for distractions or losing your motivation.
4. Consciously think positive thoughts about yourself.
It’s easier said than done – to be positive about yourself and the world, in general. But you won’t know unless you try it with all you’ve got. It’s easy to dwell on all the negatives about yourself and all that bad things happening and even worrying about the unpleasant things that may happen. Instead, focus on your present, the here and now. Appreciate all you have, and not on things you lack.
5. Appreciate yourself.
Are you proud of yourself? Did you appreciate yourself for what a great job you did with that project at work? Having high self-esteem means you need to appreciate yourself from time to time. One easy way to do this is by going over all you’ve accomplished that day, when you’re lying in bed at night. You don’t know what a big boost this can give your self-esteem.
6. Tell your internal critic to shut up.
There’s this voice inside your head that has the tendency to say the darnedest things like, you’re not pretty enough, you’re not tall enough, you’re not thin enough, you’re not busy enough, and you’re not good enough. This mean, critical voice can sometimes be too loud and persistent to ignore, especially for those with low self-esteem. You know what you need to do? Tell that crappy voice to shut up and go take a hike! You don’t need such negativity in your life. Stop selling yourself short. Stop putting yourself down. There are enough people around you that spew negativity your way; you don’t need that from yourself too.
7. Don’t compare yourself to others.
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Comparing yourself to others is one of the greatest insults you can give yourself. Don’t do it. You are you, with a unique identity, a unique path in life and career, that has nothing to do with anyone else. You may think you’re better or worse than someone, but don’t. Seriously though, stop it. What you need to be doing instead is celebrating your uniqueness, your individuality, your innate sense of being, in essence, YOU – just the way you are.
8. Perfection doesn’t exist.
Do the best you can with what you’ve got, because striving for perfection all the time, in everything you do, is like spinning endlessly on a hamster wheel. What you need to do instead, if you want to have high self-esteem, is to focus giving your best to everything you do. Also, don’t forget to celebrate your flaws, your quirks, your so-called imperfections along the way, because these are what make you, you.
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9. Keep yourself fit by being active and exercising.
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When you exercise, endorphins are released into your bloodstream, which can do wonder for your mood, your body, your mind, and even your self-esteem. Plus, it also keeps you fit and healthy, ready to take on anything that life throws your way.
10. Accept that everyone makes mistakes.
Your self-esteem takes a hit when you make a mistake. But that is not the end of the world, because even when you do something with the best of intentions, mistakes are sometimes unavoidable. Don’t beat yourself up over it too much. What’s done is done; take responsibility for the mistake, learn from it, and move on. If an apology is expected or given, be sure that it’s genuine, and not just lip service.
11. Focus on what you can change.
There are very few things that are actually in your control. So stop stressing over things you have no control over. Instead, focus on what you can change. Do everything you can to make things better, and more importantly, believe in yourself and your abilities.
12. Accept the things you can’t change.
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The best thing you can do with the things that you have no control over and can’t change, is to make peace with them. You can’t very well change them by worrying about them, can you? So don’t waste your time, energy, and stamina by obsessing over things that way beyond your control.
13. Do things you enjoy doing.
This will make you happy, plain and simple. Isn’t happiness what everyone is looking for anyway? So be happy by doing things you actually want and like to do.
14. Do something that you’re good at.
This gives your self-esteem a boost. By doing something you’re good at, you get a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction. Not only will this reinforce your belief in yourself, it will also make you feel productive and that your efforts are channeled in the right direction. That’s sure to make your feel better about yourself, isn’t it?
15. Celebrate your victories.
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No matter how small or big an accomplishment, a triumph, celebrate it. Everything you do starts with a single, seemingly insignificant step. So when you reach that final step, you need to celebrate it. Also, you shouldn’t balk at celebrating your victories, thinking that they haven’t made any impact. That’s the wrong way to go about it. Since you’re working your way through the roadmap you’ve set for yourself, these little things start to matter so much in the long run.
16. Help others, as much as you can.
Being helpful to others, being there for them in their time of need, feeling needed – are all self-esteem boosters. These give you a sense of triumph, for having been there for another human being. Not only will it enhance your mood, it will make you stand a little taller and puff out your chest a bit more.
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17. Surround yourself with supportive people.
Apart from your inner critical voice, the people around you have the potential to damage your self-esteem. So as much as you can, surround yourself with people who motivate you, support you, and make you feel good about yourself. Hanging out with people who put you down, or look down upon you isn’t good for your self-esteem or your emotional well-being. So avoid them like the plague!
These are all the tips you need to boost your self-esteem and become the best version of yourself, for YOU. Self-esteem is directly proportional to self-worth, and it’s important that you work towards elevating both, because both of them are required to have a quality life. Good luck!
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