So, you never really thought that you would move out of your fling phase. Well, really? You thought you would date this guy forever without letting him intrude your private space. But, now without you knowing it, his presence has created an indelible mark on your life and you are finding yourself spending more and more time with him each passing day. And what’s best, you do it without even realizing it. You have grown so accustomed to his presence in your life that it does not feel like intrusion of privacy any more. But a relationship for which you feel you are still not ready. Dearie, let me tell you, you are in your denial phase and nothing else, because believe it or not, you are already in a relationship.
1. You don’t think twice before grabbing one of his hoodies
So what are you wearing right now? No, I am not being voyeuristic; trust me, it is an important question. Well, lets see. If you are at his place and you are wearing your own set of clothes, then you are definitely not in a relationship. But if you’re relaxing in his hoodies and his pair of shorts, then well, I have to break it to you, the guy you are with is definitely more than a casual fling. You feel that his clothes are just meant for you, something like being close to naked kind of thing. You wear his clothes every day without even realizing it. Then who are you fooling? Well, no one but yourself! You are in a relationship!
2. He is a big part of your plans for the weekend
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What is your to-do list on weekends like (weekends because most people work on weekdays)? Does it involve him, or should I say, a lot of him? SO you guys do spend a lot of time with each other, and by a lot of time, I mean you actually plan your day in advance where you both have a lot of room for each other. And surprisingly, the time you spend with each other does not even accommodate sex or make out sessions. It’s the actual time that you spend with each other, doing things you both like and enjoy. If this is the case, then there is no denying, you two are in a relationship!
3. You send each other sentimental texts
You send sentimental texts to each other without being dirty or seductive, which is not the case when you are simply dating. When you are dating, the texts focus more on the physical traits of the person and less on his/her emotional characteristics. But now, suddenly, the onus has shifted to emotions, and your texts have ample emotional content suggesting that you need each other emotionally, without even hinting at the physical dependency part.
4. Going to bed doesn’t necessarily mean sex
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When you sleep with him, you actually sleep with him, a comfortable, zzzzz sleep! You two don’t feel the need to have sex every time you find yourselves in bed together. You’re as likely to have a pleasant conversation as you are of having sex. Granted, that sex is an important part of a healthy relationship, but it doesn’t mean you both feel the need to jump the other every chance you get. Well, if this is the case, then congrats, you are in a relationship!
5. You are comfortable staying in as much as going out
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When someone asks you about your plans that night, you casually answer with a ‘Oh, we are planning to watch a rerun of Friends over pizza,’ without even realizing it, then you know you are way beyond the dating stage. You have let this person into your life without even knowing it, because being with him is easy, convenient and effortless. You don’t even know that you are with someone who isn’t you.
6. You are yourself in each other’s presence
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When you don’t have to get ready to see him, or you don’t spend hours in front of the mirror fretting over one thing or another, just because you want everything to be perfect, then you are in a relationship! You can meet him in your night clothes, and neither of you would be uncomfortable with it. Hell, you don’t even need to shave your legs to be with him, because being with each other is just so easy for the both of you. You know you need not be perfect to see him, because just being with him is perfection in itself.
7. You do things for each other effortlessly
When you fill your shopping bag with things that aren’t for you, and you do it so casually that you don’t even realize you are filling up your bag with the things that interest your significant other, then you are officially in a relationship. It means that you care enough for him to know exactly what his likes and dislikes are and your shopping revolves around those things.
8. You have eyes only for him
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You don’t look for your prospective partner on social networking and/or dating sites any more, because deep down you know that you have found him, even when you consciously deny any such thing brewing between the two of you. You know that he makes you feel the way no one else can, and you just don’t want to be with anyone else but him. You plan your days so that both of you get a lot of time to spend with each other, yet neither of you feels that the other person is intruding on his/her privacy. Then there is no use denying it further because you two are in a relationship.
A relationship is a beautiful state to be in. It happens when two people come closer to each other, consciously or subconsciously, and the bond grows with time. Sometimes, two people are so deeply involved with each other, that the other person seems like a part of them. But people don’t like to admit that they are in a relationship, because they feel that relationships are for those who don’t value their freedom and space, and you definitely are not one of them.
But a relationship means that two people are so comfortable in each other’s company that they don’t feel that their freedom is being compromised, because the things they used to do alone, they have no qualms about doing it in front of the other person. So a relationship is not about sacrificing your privacy and individuality, it’s about sharing and nurturing it with the other person.
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