Secrets To A Happy Marriage Are Honesty, Compromise, And Having Separate Toilets!

by Chaitra Ramalingegowda · April 11, 2015

What would you say is the secret to a happy marriage? Trust, honesty, and a sense of humor to see the lighter side of life figure on the top of anyone’s list, a new survey has other things to add to this list. Check out the secrets to a happy marriage that were arrived at after the survey.

The survey, conducted on 2000 happily married British couples, was to mark the launch of a new book titled, How to Seduce Your Wife (or Anyone Else’s) by Andy Gibney.

Image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License

While trust, a shared sense of humor, and honesty figure at the top of the list of secrets to a happy marriage, a few unexpected ones figure too. Some of the odd ones that the British couples felt key to a happy marriage included having two cars, separate bathrooms and televisions. Rounding off the top 5 were remembering each other’s birthdays and anniversaries came in fourth and accepting each other’s faults at the fifth.

One might think that regular sex would figure somewhere at the top of the list, but it came in at 20^th on the list. Some of the other important ones that couples stressed on were staying away from tablets and/or computers for at least one night a week and sharing phone code and/or social media platforms. Blissful couples said saying I love you regularly helps keep a relationship happy and harmonious.

Speaking about the factors on the list, Andy Gibney, author of the book said,

“Trust, compromise, and honesty are generally regarded as the most important things in a marriage but for most people, it’s not that simple.”

“In the modern world, marriages are having to survive against a host of new technology with many couple falling out over what to watch on the TV or one of both of you spending too much time focusing on your computers, tablets or mobile phones.

“Romance is also an important factor, whether this is a surprise gift, a date night or simply some quality time together. After being married for a while, it’s easy to find you are stuck in a rut and not really paying each other any attention, but hopefully some of these ‘secrets’ will be helpful,” opined Gibney.

Image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License

Compromising, knowing when to apologize, being able to laugh at each other, and having a similar outlook on life round off the top ten. While we’ve written about the scientific benefits of cuddling, the same advice has been given by the happily married couples in the survey. Hugging and cuddling, always kissing each other good night, and surprising your partner with a romantic gesture are all recommended.

Some of the other secrets to a happy marriage include never going to sleep angry, sharing aims and ambitions, and a continued effort to look nice for you partner. Something as simple and touching as holding hands when you’re out and about makes a lot of difference, say couples.

The survey coughed up some interesting insights besides listing the 50 secrets to a happy marriage.

1. Three quarters of people thought that if you’re friends before becoming an item, you’re more likely to have a happy and successful marriage

2. 95% of those polled considered romance to be important for a happy marriage

3. 29% wanted a little surprise from their partner every now and then

4. Less than one in ten people wanted the traditional flowers and chocolates

5. 21% perceived gifts as romantic gestures if it was something personal to them

Mr Gibney added,

“It should be obvious that it is communication that keeps people together, whether that’s verbal or non-verbal, but life has a way of getting in the way. The research, and the message in the book, is keep talking, keep laughing, keep doing the things that made you happy at the start of your relationship and never lose it.”

Image source: Pixabay, under Creative Commons License

In conclusion, he said,

“Keep the respect, keep the kissing and the intimacy, and above all, remember why you fell in love in the first place.”

Check out the full list of 50 secrets to a happy marriage here below:

Trusting each other
Same sense of humor
Always being honest with each other
Remember birthdays and anniversaries
Accepting each other’s faults
Compromising
Saying ‘I love you’ regularly
Knowing when to say sorry
Being able to laugh at each other
Having a similar outlook on life
Regular hugs/cuddles
Always kiss each other goodnight
The occasional romantic gesture
Considering your partner to be your best friend
Sharing the parenting duties
Always kiss each other goodbye in the mornings
Having some shared hobbies and interests
Always talk about a problem rather than bottling it up
Ask each other about their day
Regular sex
Having some different hobbies and interests
Knowing when to give each other some space
Never going to sleep on an argument
Regular holidays/mini breaks
Having similar aims and ambitions
Having the odd argument or disagreement
Continuing to make an effort to look nice for your partner
Getting on with each other’s family
Setting aside quality time for each other
Holding hands when you are out and about
Regularly complimenting each other
Having your own friends as well as mutual friends
Two TVs in the house
Getting on with each other’s friends
Each having a car
Still shaving/grooming
Each having equal share of the lie-ins when you have children
Separate bank accounts
Having regular nights out with friends, without your partner
Surprise gifts/presents
Not being friends with ANY ex-partners on Facebook
A rota to divide up the household chores
Regular date nights
Two bathrooms/toilets
Not having one person hogging the remote control
Similar working hours
Knowing each other’s passcode for their phone
A secret stash of cash they know nothing about
Keeping some things private (not going to the toilet in front of each other, etc.,)
A night or two a week where neither of you use computers/laptops/phones, etc.,