If you are pondering how to choose between two guys, you are in the most envious positions, according to others. We, however, know that it is not a very fun thing! But who said it couldn’t be made relatively easier, huh?
Being in a love triangle and choosing between two guys sounds like a dream come true, and it does make you feel incredibly great about yourself, but it can be a difficult situation to get yourself out of. Though you enjoy spending time with both the guys, sooner or later you will have to pick one of them, one without whom you wouldn’t be able to function!
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To help you with that, we have designed a 20-point questionnaire that you need to fill to find out which of the two guys is the one for you!
1. What are the qualities of each guy?
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The next time you are around each guy, make a conscious effort to actually engage in a meaningful conversation, so that you can think about what are the qualities that you like in him. It may not be possible to pin down exactly because the feelings are complicated, but asking this question to yourself is vital. Does this guy make you laugh? Is he humorous? Or does he make you feel awkward. The guy you choose should be funny yet not cross the line.
2. How curious is he?
Does this guy seem very inquisitive about life? Or is he too infatuated with himself? Guys who are self-obsessed can be extremely boring. You should always go for the guy who has a number of passions and hobbies, who has many friends, and one who has an interesting take on life. Again, guys who are too curious about other people are prone to gossiping, which is an awfully unattractive quality in a person!
3. Is he sensitive and empathetic?
If you ask me how to choose between two guys, I would say, go for the one who is in touch with his emotional side. Most of the guys are thoughtful but they hide this side of them since they don’t want people to see how vulnerable they can be. A guy who can comfortably let people see his sensitivity is both confident of himself and mature.
4. How flirtatious is he?
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Can I put it this way: Which one of the two guys flirts respectfully? To simplify the query further: Do you think he is in this for your looks and your body, or the kind of person you are, or both? You can easily figure this out by paying attention to the kind of compliments each guy gives you.
5. Does he like savoring the moment?
I mean, does he take things slow? The one who does is more likely to devour each moment and live it to the fullest. This guy will care a great deal about enjoying his time when he is with you, ensuring that you too are having a blast. Contrarily, the guy who moves at the speed of light (or should I say gossip!) can be a major let-down.
6. How does he make you feel?
Now, this is crucial when you are thinking of how to choose between two guys. Here are a few sub-questions you need to consider:
- Do you feel special around him?
- Or does he treat all girls like that?
- Does he make you feel like a better person?
- Does he make you giggle and blush like a little gal?
- But at the same time, does he treat you like a lady?
7. What are his negative qualities?
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Consider which of the guys has a bigger baggage; which of them has a slew of past relationship issues to deal with? Even if one of them is more fun, you have to ensure that he is the responsible kind. Also, is he bossy? Is he incapable of apologizing when he is wrong? This is essential to figure out if one of the guys is selfish or not.
8. How does each guy feel about you?
If both of them are devoted to you then, I believe, we have a tough task at hand! You cannot ask both of them outright, and so, you need to sense it out! How often does each hang out with you and does he like talking about the future? Now the latter part of the question depends on whether you want a dating experience for just a few months or looking for something that is long term.
9. What do your trusted friends think about each guy?
It’s not about who they like better. Rather ask, “Who, according to you, is better for me?” The suggestions you get from your friends can be really helpful. But you must be open to their advice. However, if you have already made up your mind about the guy you want to be with, you shouldn’t ask your friends for their opinion because it would only confuse you unnecessarily.
10. What are the similarities and differences you share?
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For all you list people, like moi, create one, stating what you like in your guy and what you don’t. A pros and cons chart, weighing the strengths and weaknesses of each guy, will also be of great help.
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11. Ask yourself the following questions before making the list
- Which guy is likely to treat me like his queen?
- Which guy will have my back in times of trouble?
- Which guy seems like my soul-twin?
- Which guy do I miss more when he is not around?
- Which guy is more amicable with my family and friends?
12. What are the red flags?
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More than often, the red flags glare at us from the very beginning, but we conveniently ignore them. In this situation, however, you have to identify the warning signals and deal with them immediately. Does one of them poke fun at you? Does he actually make you feel very bad about being the way you are? Does he have some serious addictions? Is he abusive? These questions are crucial.
13. What are the outcomes of the decision you take?
The consequences need to be thought of deeply. When you picture your life with or without either of the two guys, how do you feel? Which one of them do you think is easy to get over? If you think you can live without one of them but living without the other seems painful, go for the latter!
14. Messages or calls from whom gets you more excited?
When you are deeply in love with someone, even a text or a ping from them can make you feel all flushed and blushy and excited! Which of the two guys gives you the butterflies in your stomach? Who do you secretly wish has called, when you hear your ringtone?
15. Who do you enjoy conversing with?
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In the end, it’s always the words that take our hearts away. When choosing between two people, you should always pick the one with whom conversations are not forced. So who do you want to be with is directly related to who stimulates you both mentally and physically!
16. With whom does silence not hurt?
Having an amazing conversation is a great thing, but what about those necessary pauses, those moments of stillness and hush? If you are seeing someone with whom even sitting in a room, doing your own thing, without speaking a single word seems like the best conversation you ever had, you already know who your soul mate is!
17. Which one of the two guys makes you feel sexier?
I am sure, both your guys make you feel like the best gal out there, but only one guy will make you feel like there cannot be another you. You would always want to be with a man who makes you feel like a billion bucks, even when you think you are a tainted old penny!
18. Which of them makes you feel secure?
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You should always choose that guy who strives to keep you comfortable and make you feel safe. Among the two, if one works really hard to make you feel a hell lot protected, you already know which one to go for!
19. Who can you be yourself around?
If you need to fake in front of one of the guys, you are not only cheating on them but cheating on your own self. If you can laugh the way you want, eat the things you want to, watch the movies you enjoy watching, with one of the guys without fear of being judged, you should choose him without a second thought!
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20. Who do you feel more natural with?
Being happy with someone should not be an effort. It should come naturally. After all, love and liking cannot be forced. They just happen. So you need to determine which one of the two guys you feel more natural to be with. Pick the man whose company feels just right!
Once you do make a choice between the two guys, don’t feel guilty about it. Also, you need to explain to the other guy that there is nothing wrong with him, but that he is just not the one for you. No hard feelings!
Featured image source: venturegalleries
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