A relationship is just like food. If it starts getting bland, you need to pepper it with a good amount of spice for it to appeal to your senses again. When juggling work-related stress and burgeoning home responsibilities, it is not unusual for couples to leave intimacy in the backseat and toss romance out the window.
When we say intimacy, we don’t just mean love-making – it is a prelude to anticipation, a sensual rush of excitement and exhilaration, and a curtain-raiser to naughty discoveries and playful encounters that every couple must explore. In the words of die-hard romantic Oscar Wilde, “I can resist everything except temptation.” So why try in vain? Here are 11 tempting and intimate activities you and your partner should not hesitate to try out. Get wild, get wicked, and let some excitement flow through your nerves once again.
1. A good massage
Never underestimate the power of the healing touch, which your partner would die for after a long and laborious day at work. A salubrious massage releases anxiety and stress, promotes good sleep, and boosts immunity. Caressing, fondling, or stroking produces oxytocin, the feel-good “love hormone.” A kiss on the nape, a touch making its way up the thigh, or the lightest brush of the back are huge turn-ons. That’s just where the sensory magic begins.
Set the scene for intimacy with soft music and scented candles; leave your phones behind on the couch. Have your partner lie down with their head on a soft pillow. This automatically eases the entire body from stress – and pumps it up for some action.
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Bring out the perfumed aroma oil and apply it liberally on their body with long and loving strokes. Rub their temples and forehead, gently massage their scalp with delicate moves of your fingertips, and press soft kisses to their earlobes, an ultra-erogenous zone. Sliding a finger back and forth between the toes can be unimaginably erotic too.
Don’t be shy about letting your hands wander anywhere, everywhere – touch your partner the way you would like them to touch you. The trick here is to build up tension slowly, which will easily lead to pleasurable chills and new orgasmic heights. To maintain a truly intimate connection, try touching each other without surrendering yourselves to sex for a few days. Intimacy is not always about sex, right?
Bonus: If you are the uber-romantic type, try giving her a chocolate massage. It works wonders! Ummhh. Yeah.
2. A sexy love note
No, we don’t expect you to slave over a cloying, corny love letter (yawn!). But a little naughty note can send blood rushing into both your veins and shoot up your hormone levels.
Let your pen flirt around with some sizzling risqué communiqué. There is nothing like reading erotica by your own lover. Throw in a few compliments about the good time you had last night. Tell them how much you look forward to feeling them in your arms again. Anticipation is the secret sauce of romance – create a spicy invitation for some hot and heavy action, and deliver every promise. If possible, put your groan of pleasure on paper – it will keep them thinking of you all day long.
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Choose an equally sexy hiding place to tuck away your note. Slip it under her wedding ring or a pillow, stick it on the steering wheel, hide it in her lingerie drawer. After all, who doesn’t like to find a bit of unexpected affection in the most unlikely of places?
Tip: You score extra brownie points if you include a sweet gift with the note. A bottle of scented massage oil, a bar of dark chocolate, a glass of wine, or fresh flowers make sure winners!
3. Go lingerie shopping
There is no shying away from this one. Think sexy, feel sexy. How about surprising her with something that is very close to her (and of course, you) – some sexy lingerie? Men cringe at the idea of shopping, but when it comes to lingerie, you know you’re all game!
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Let your imagination run wild and use your “hunter instincts” for this one. Take a sneak peek into her wardrobe, or simply note down the number tag when she is deep in slumber after that passionate lovemaking encounter. Just make sure you get the size right – you don’t want your woman to go hopping mad at you if you buy her something that doesn’t fit, do you?
Keep in mind that women and men find different things sexy. So proceed with caution – get naughty, but not too much! Go for something minimalistic yet titillating. Thongs, lacy tops, and satin undies are some good options. If you don’t want a dozen eyes prying at you when you enter a lingerie store solo, online shopping is a safe bet.
4. Do the laundry
Let’s face it – women bear most of the burden around the house. No matter how much time a man spends at work, they tend to become slackers when it comes to helping the wife with the chores. It is also grossly unfair for the multi-tasking lady of the house to take on unnecessary stress on the days she feels the PMS blues.
Attention men! You don’t want us to get cranky over unmade beds, grimy plates, and unwashed laundry, do you? Then would you please do us a favor?
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If you expect your wife to fetch the kids from school, pay the bills, and dish out finger-licking fare for your lunch box, you’ve got to repay her in a kinder way, mister! Helping her with the laundry or doing the dishes for a change can do your partner a whole lot of good, especially when she needs it on those mood-swinging days.
Don’t throw a fit or turn up your nose when she asks you to help – instead, do it without her asking. Your partner will get some much-needed “me time” for herself and relax a bit when she is at her most vulnerable. Just being there for her will do more for her than anything you say or do. Your sole goal should be to help her feel as relaxed as possible.
5. Sensual baths
A nice bath is the ultimate antidote to cold winters and daily stress – sexier than skinny dipping and far more steamy and sensuous. Your next sexy getaway with your partner should be in the bathtub. An uninterrupted session of a long, warm bath together with some wine is a hit recipe for some well-deserved intimacy with your partner.
To create a romantic ambience, prep your washroom. Don’t limit intimacy to the bedroom – create a stage for an encore performance in the bathroom! Look at it as a theatrical piece – you need the right lighting, right mood, and setting. Stock the shower with generous goodies to pamper your partner – treat their body to a luxurious therapeutic rub with massage oils. Being all lathered up is going to drive them wild.
So, what are you waiting for? Sink yourself into the bath tub, sprinkle some heavenly-smelling rose petals, and have some bubbly handy for you to pop with your partner.
6. Watch porn together
Watching porn with your partner can be good for your relationship. We ain’t kidding! It is a great way to learn about your partner’s fantasies, likes, and dislikes, while inviting excitement and exploration. With a simple touch of a button, not only can you view your deepest secret fantasies enacted on the screen, but you can also witness your partner’s arousal.
Be honest with your partner about what you would like to watch and what turns you on. You don’t have to feel threatened or insecure about your partner being turned on by others – they will, and it is absolutely natural. Remember that this is a mutually pleasurable experience that can speed up foreplay and expedite intimate moments for the two of you.
After all, a couple that “plays” together, stays together. Do something adventurous for once. If you and your partner haven’t included watching porn on your to-do romance sheet, there’s no time like now.
7. Hold hands
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Take hand-holding to a new level. Don’t just hold hands awkwardly as you walk together – make it more intimate by exploring their hands with yours. Trail your fingers along theirs, sneak in love notes into their palms, and kiss their fingers as they’re interlaced with yours. This is sexy without the sex and a great intimate activity you can do together anytime, even in public.
8. Play together
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Never miss a chance to play together. Taunting each other with pillow fights and tickling each other are fun ways to develop a physical connection with your partner. Have you tried footsie under the table or while lying in bed with your partner?
9. It’s all about role play and foreplay
Exploit your imagination to the extreme. Get adventurous. Break the traditional and monotonous patterns under the sheets.
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Consider taking a fantasy role in the bedroom, like role-playing as an erotic masseuse. Channel your inner Christian Grey, and make your woman breathless with your idea of what sex should be like. Make foreplay interesting by indulging in your fantasies. Fondling your partner’s most sensitive erogenous zones and delaying the climax can have you longing for each other all day long for another explosive encounter.
10. Cook together, naked
As scandalous it may sound, it’s worth a try. Grab each other’s eyeballs by cooking a meal together full-monty, or by wearing just aprons with nothing else underneath. This will only “spice up” your meal.
11. A romantic date
Nothing creates intimacy more than the classic date. Go for long walks on the beach, let the waves kiss your bare feet as you hold hands together, gaze at the moonlight, and let your love blossom.
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Creating a romantic dinner with libido-boosting foods, or aphrodisiacs, can fuel some cozy, intimate moments. For example, chocolate contains phenethylamine, the brain’s best known love chemical. Indulge in some chocolate together – the Cadbury Silk ads were popular for a reason.
Candlelight dinners are too passé. Instead, cook them an exquisite and elaborate meal of their own liking. Taking the time to do things for your partner shows that you respect their feelings and love them despite their preferences.
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