Marriages, as we are told to believe, are made in heaven. So whether they are ‘arranged’ by others for the couple or are affected by the willingness of the couple themselves, they are altogether an exciting and enduring experience!
As the cliché goes, in an arranged marriage, we are asked to marry/sleep with a complete stranger, while we are taught since childhood not to talk to strangers or take candy from them. But there is more to the debate than this cliché. Arranged marriages are in no way forced. Agreed that they are arranged by a third party like a matchmaker, parents, or relatives of the couple concerned, these people are only clearing the road ahead, making the union conducive.
The ‘Matchmaking’ Mathematics:
Matchmakers are usually high-end socialites who are well-linked with people from all social strata. When presented with a photograph and an astrological chart, they scan through their database of hundreds of profiles and find the best matches that seem compatible. Many partners are chosen, many meetings are held; but it is the individual discretion of the couple to accept if they feel the ship is sailing smoothly, or to reject, if they feel the waters are choppy.
The match-finding is usually considered for the boy at a time when he has become financially stable with a secure job and sometimes even the proud owner of immovable property, and for the girl when she is about to complete her graduation. Say, don’t you like leafing through bundles of photographs of potential partners all waiting to ‘settle’ with you, and accepting or rejecting them based on your conscience, or rather, intuition? But mind you, this ensues only after you’ve taken the big ‘Oath of Secrecy’, that none shall ever know who approached whom. All marriage negotiations are conducted ‘in camera,’ i.e., in private. Once a potential alliance is rejected due to some reason or the other, all history of any conversation between them is erased completely.
What it has in Store for You
We all have heard about that age old adage of the battle of the sexes, which still remains inconclusive, owing to the lock and key theory of the male and the female. Arranged marriages exploit just this advantage, where one fills up the loopholes in the other. Yes, it is to be remembered at all times that we, as humans, have our own limitations and tolerance levels. Some are set by ourselves; some are inherently present within us. People naturally adjust and agree to compromise as long as it does not go beyond their comfort zone. But the moment one touches the extreme, there is always a chance to say ‘NO!’ The third party or matchmakers, or what they should be called, Party Makers, are merely agents that urge you to go ahead and see things for yourself.
This means that a lot of thought and planning goes into the consideration of a potential life partner. Couples try and understand each other’s needs, likes, dislikes. Clear conscience and good judgment is what goes into the making of a successful alliance. The couples are happier; as they spend the first 2-3 years of their marriage putting in efforts to understand and know their partners, and also grow – together.
What are You Waiting For
So get up, dress up in your favorite attire, and go meet that stranger! Have a quiet luncheon, or go bowling with them. This is a phase that you would love to reminisce about in the not-too distant future. And who knows? You might just see heaven while you’re still a mortal weakling on Earth!