If you are the one your friends call at 3 am to get them out of a ticket, drive them to the airport for an early morning takeoff or simply, get to a person they’ve been eyeing for a long time (because you are friends with everybody), chances are you are a people pleaser. Being one myself, I can swear it’s a good thing until it’s not. No, seriously.
Being a people pleaser isn’t always the ‘good’ thing it looks like in your head. It can be nerve-wracking and may force you (oftener than you imagine) to tear your brains out and smash them against the wall. It’s like it doesn’t know the word ‘no’ and vomits ‘yes’ like a reflex to anything anybody says. Sometimes, it pushes you beyond the ambit of ‘nice’ to super-nice and trust me, it isn’t very nice out there.
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If you want to stay sane even as you retain your people pleaser tag, you may want to check in on what’s going wrong and where. You could also use tips on how to please others without having your own needs consumed (supersumed, if I may) by their desires. Here’s the zodiac to the rescue:
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Aries (March 21 – April 19)
You have a tough time popping the word ‘no’ when it comes to near and dear ones. But remember that even superheroes need a refill and it is only so long until you can s*ck it up before you let blast. Try to tune the expectations of your friends and families to your availability. Also, try to rule out the need to accommodate everyone’s needs and desires in your routine even if your schedule, health or inclination does not permit it.
Taurus (April 20 – May 20)
You have a habit of putting others first, even if it comes at the cost of harming yourself. Remember that it isn’t healthy to put others before you to the point of disregarding your own physical, mental and emotional health. Follow your instinct when it comes to ‘being there’ for people but remember you’ve gotta report on that duty for yourself first.
Gemini (May 21 – June 20)
You have the problem of apologizing for every little thing. You know that it cannot be your fault every time and yet, you have no qualms dishing out a ‘sorry’ every time things go South. It wouldn’t be so bad if only matters ended there but you tend to beat yourself up for it and attribute the blame to yourself. You need to break free of the toxic habit and ease the self-imposed pressure.
Cancer (June 21 – July 22)
You tend to hold onto your relationships, even after they are gone. Your exes, your ex-bffs are all on your communication radar because you still care. You tend to look past the hurt they inflicted and the pain they caused you- because you wish to remain friends and want the best for them. You may do so in latent hopes that they may appreciate your effort but that day is almost as real as elves!
Leo (July 23 – Aug. 22)
You are a born leader and as such, tend to push the needs of your community over and above your own. This seldom leaves you with downtime to focus on your own needs, goals and aspirations and may, in turn, make you feel a vacuity within that not much else can fulfill. Stop pushing your own agenda for accommodating that of others’. Your foremost responsibility is toward yourself.
Virgo (Aug. 23 – Sept. 22)
Your habit of over thinking and overanalyzing everything, especially your own actions, makes you susceptible to a crumbling confidence. Even as you are doing things for others, you ensure that you match their requisites to the T. You always want to make sure that your actions don’t affect anyone negatively- however, you tend to be overtly critical of them yourself and putting a stop to that may help you do good to yourself and unto others.
Libra (Sept. 23 – Oct. 22)
You have a tendency to put up with negative and toxic people too because you do not want to hurt their feelings. You do not want any bad blood and hence, steer clear of any judgments or opinions that may create a tiff. You are so afraid of conflict that you would much rather pretend than confront. Try and be authentic.
Scorpio (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21)
You cannot let people know they’ve hurt you and this ruins your emotional makeup. Don’t seethe in isolation and call people out on their hurtful actions. You cannot let people take advantage of the goodness in your heart and let them get under your skin.
Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21)
You live to make your loved ones laugh. You have often been accused of being too caring or too loving- but you can’t help it because you feel that everyone deserves to be happy and you can’t let a few bad people bring the world down.
Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19)
You have the tendency to help out everyone in need. If anyone has a problem, they turn to you because they know you have all the solutions. The process is exhausting but you do not mind it because it is hardwired in your nature. You may want to tone it down as much as is required to be able to devote ample time to our own needs.
Aquarius (Jan. 20 – Feb. 18)
You tend to be silly with drawing boundaries. You let people in and out of your world easy and this leaves you immensely vulnerable to the damage the world can wreak on you. You want to be liked so much that you are willing to invest your trust and appeal in everyone- without as much as a care about how gullible it makes you to emotional predators. You need to learn to draw boundaries.
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Pisces (Feb. 19 – March 20)
You are pretty selfless in relationships and hence, are taken advantage of. You are willing to do anything and everything for the sake of people you love- but may want to learn where to draw the line. Hint: It’s right where your heart is. Guard it.
You are welcome!
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