Love is an addiction. After all, it is the most powerful force in this world. It keeps us alive and makes us better. Though, there is this thing about love – it is highly addictive. Do you ever wonder why we keep visiting our past, even after being happy with our present? There is a reason why we keep looking back, even after walking away from someone. We all crave for love in our own ways and cherish the idea of being with someone for the rest of our life.
Yes, people have different priorities and chances are that for someone their professional life or family might be more important than love. There is nothing wrong with it at all! We all set our priorities and no one can judge us for that. Though, there are a few people in this world who can’t really survive without love. Instead of pushing them away, one should try to understand them. If you have a friend or a close family member who is suffering from love addiction, try to help them. If you still can’t see beyond the obvious, learn more about it.
Suggested read: 16 subtle and not-so-subtle signs you’re addicted to love
Here are a few reasons to make you believe why addiction to love should be taken seriously and how people who are suffering from it should be dealt with.
1. It is just like any other addiction
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Before you relate it to any other psychological term, start by understanding that it is just like any other kind of addiction. Truth to be told, we all are addicted to some or other kind of thing in this world. It could be a thing, a person, or even a feeling. Do you think you find it hard to get ready or commence your day without getting a cup of coffee? Can you go on for days without checking your phone and all those social media profiles of yours? Do you need a glass of wine after every hectic day? The answer is pretty loud and clear, right? You might not know this, but chances are that you are addicted to a lot of things in your life already.
There are certainly some dreadful kinds of obsessions in this world. People are addicted to drugs and alcohol, which is one of the worst kinds of habits. Considering all the other kind of practices, love addiction is certainly not the worst of them. Nevertheless, it should not be treated lightly as well. Getting addicted to love is quite similar to getting addicted to coffee. You might think it is easy to change your habit, but it might take forever to even take the first step. Before you judge someone, try to understand that it is just like any other kind of addiction and can’t be fixed in the blink of an eye.
2. It’s all about love!
Love is the most unadulterated and powerful emotions of all. It is that one force which keeps us all together. Yes, getting addicted to love is certainly not a good thing, but it is the kind of emotion that no one can say no to. Deep within, we all want to be loved. We want an assurance and would like to have a future with someone. The entire institution of marriage is based on the same principle.
When you can’t ignore the power of love, how can you expect someone else to overlook it? A love addict might come out as a hopeless romantic, but won’t ever harm you in any physical or psychological way. They would only need some kind of an assurance and there is nothing wrong with that.
3. There could be plenty of reasons behind it
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Before you label someone as a love addict, try to understand the origin of their behavior. In most of the cases, it is caused by low self-esteem or a past abusive relationship. They could have had a dysfunctional family and might be having some issues of their own.
Just like any other addiction, it can be caused by plenty of factors like a distant family member, a bullied childhood, an abusive relationship, dominating friends, sibling rivalry, and so on. Low self-esteem is one of the major causes of it and instead of simply neglecting the issue, you should make an effort. Try to talk to the one who is suffering from this kind of addiction and boost their morale. Learn their story before making a judgment.
4. It comes in various stages
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You might now know that almost every addiction has different stages, and addiction to love is certainly not an exception. It starts with over-protectiveness. A person who is addicted to love might not accept their partner going out with their friends or meeting new people. The second stage is Greater Dependency in which they would be overly dependent on their partner for almost everything. It is followed by a decrease in self-worth and subsequently leads to numbness of feelings. The person might feel trapped without the need of stepping out of the cage that is created by them.
Yes, it isn’t that simple after all. If your loved one is going through one of these stages, start by identifying their behavior and make sure they don’t progress to another stage.
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5. They love selflessly
You can’t get angry at them, because at the end of the day, you know they love you with the whole of their heart. In this fast-paced world, finding selfless love is almost next to impossible. Most of the love addicts fall in love sincerely and are extremely loyal. If you are in a relationship with someone who is going through the same phase, don’t push them away. Instead, feel fortunate to be with someone who can do anything to be with you. Understand their behavior and make an effort to be with them.
6. There is nothing wrong with being addicted to love
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There are a lot of people in this world who are addicted to some of the most dreadful things. Love is the most beautiful feeling in this world and there is nothing wrong with being addicted to it. Yes, crossing the line and developing a negative psychological behavior is certainly wrong, but having a mild addiction for someone is not harmful at all.
As discussed, there are different stages of addiction to love. If you think your partner is being overprotective, try to have a conversation with them and let them know your concern. It is always preferred to identify the behavior at an early stage, as it can be taken care of without any hassle.
7. You can’t solve it by alienating them
Most of the people think that the only way to solve it is by alienating the victim. It can be just like any other addiction, but you can’t solve it in a textbook way. Keeping an alcoholic away from wine can only give you a temporary solution. The same way, alienating the victim will only make them feel abandoned and they might start hating themselves.
Only love can cure something like this. Instead of despising them, you should be their friend. Don’t push them away, as it might hurt them even more!
8. A love addict can change
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This is a proven fact. Luckily, one can move over their addiction and be better in the long run. If you know someone who is a love addict, then make sure you give them enough time. Try to have a conversation with them and understand the cause of their behavior. If you think they need some professional help, take them to a therapist and try to talk to their friends and family. Gather their loved ones together and make an effort, as you can change their behavior in due time.
Suggested read: How to set boundaries in an addictive relationship
9. Only love can change them!
There is only one kind of love that can cure your addiction and that is the love for yourself. If a friend of yours is addicted to love, then let them know their own worth. Make them realize that they don’t need anyone else to define them. Self-love is the most powerful medicine in this world and with just the right dose of it, they can certainly heal themselves.
Most of the love addicts believe that they need to be with someone else in order to make them complete. The idea of being in a romantic relationship and having a future with someone they care about might trigger their addiction to another level. Instead, let them know that they are enough in the most thoughtful way.
There is only one person who is standing between them and their share of happiness – and that is themselves. Let them find peace in their own company and make them fall in love with their loneliness. The moment they would accept themselves with their flaws, they would realize that they don’t need anyone else to be happy. They have themselves – and that is enough.
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