It is human nature to never be satisfied with what we have. If we have a secure life and income, we work harder to make our life even more comfortable; and if we are living a comfortable lifestyle, we begin to wish for classy luxuries that would set us apart from those around us. What’s more, for the married among us, we often feel that no amount of income is sufficient. Besides running a household, we must fulfill the many needs of family members – medical expenses, educational expenses, shopping, and the seemingly never-ending pile of bills to be paid.
Experts have said that money is the number one reason behind wrecked marriages, followed by raising kids and sex. They say that money cannot buy love, but in reality you do need money to buy a comfortable, stress-free married life. The best solution to avoiding financial problems lies in knowing when to spend and when not to spend.
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Before getting hitched, look into some invaluable pieces of advice on how to save and spend money wisely to protect yourself from a thousand different calamities.
1. Be honest when it comes to telling each other about assets
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Your partner will be hurt and emotionally shattered if they discover that you possess assets that they have no idea about. To avoid money issues that such a situation may give rise to, you should be honest and tell everything about each one of your possessions to your future partner even before your marriage. After all, why must you hide such a thing from your soul mate with whom you have decided to spend each second of your future life with?
2. Don’t let unemployment, pink slips, or layoffs destroy your marriage
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Such problems lead to severe financial crisis, which in turn can ruin your mental wellness, shattering your confidence and making a mess of your self-esteem. All these in turn will affect your marriage – you may take your frustration out on your partner, causing serious conflicts and quarrels. Before marriage, you have to talk amongst yourselves as to what your stand should be if either one of you faces such a situation, which can happen anytime to anybody. This way, you will be prepared for the worst.
3. Plan how you will finance raising your children
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Before marriage, financial responsibilities do not seem to be too burdensome, but as the days pass and little bundles of joy get added to your family, catering to their every need and whim quickly adds up. Children are a great responsibility by themselves as you have to pay for their school bills, food, and clothing. Moreover, the cost of their sports, entertainment, and other recreational activities can run high. If you do not plan this ahead, this will give rise to some very serious money problems in your marriage. We suggest that you plan with your partner-to-be before you exchange your vows as to how you will be able to meet those expenses.
Another important thing that you should do in the long run is to give your kids important money lessons about how not to be extravagant and/or frivolous with money. You can also show them the different avenues and paths that will help them earn good money.
4. Discuss before making purchases of long lasting goods
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Some items that make up your married life may last a lifetime, and couples tend to form an emotional attachment with these things. Hence you should take the advice and opinions of your future spouse before making such a purchase, be it a house or a car or even a condo. Mutual consent while making these purchases is important, because if your partner dislikes it, they will forever bear a grudge against it. Only buy long lasting things after the both of you have agreed on it.
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5. Decide wisely on how much you want to splurge on a special occasion
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The key problem in this case is that spouses think differently on how much to spend on an event, be it anniversaries or birthdays. This issue can be resolved by coming to a compromise about what to do in such situations even before your marriage. Decide before marriage that you will spend a reasonable amount and not overspend. So if your partner thinks you need to spend $200 for your friend’s birthday and you think you need to spend just $100, we suggest you go for an amount that is neither your pick nor theirs, but lies somewhere in between. If you go for $150, then both you and your partner will be happy about it. And that, my friend, is the art of compromise.
6. Don’t let vacations turn into nightmares
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Vacations may seem fun, but only until you both sit together and start planning for it. You do need vacations and time off from your daily routine, but you can’t do that at the cost of your financial capacity. Vacation planning is a huge source of differing ideas, which can lead to tiffs year after year when you should instead be happily holidaying. So, to avoid all of that, discuss with your partner about what you want to do for your vacations in the future years – if you must go out on vacations every year or you could just instead plan on spending more quality time with your family. Discuss whether you must take first class, or if economy class works too. Decide that you should save in advance and also that both of you will take turns to plan your vacations. That way, you will be able to avoid major fights.
7. If you have a family already, plan expenses methodically
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A second marriage will obviously put a strain on your financial strength, so take extra measures to manage your budget properly. It is not impossible to meet new financial needs and maintain what you already have. Accept your responsibilities and understand that you have to maintain both sides in order to avoid resentment.
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8. Don’t let superiority come with money making power
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Sometimes, it so happens that both partners do not earn, and in this case the one who is earning tries to get an upper hand over the one who is not. If one person is employed and the other is not, or if one spouse earns more than the other, it can lead to a sense of superiority. Such superiority may also be the result of one family being financially more stable than the other. In these situations, the one who is earning or earning more, will want to have the final say on various matters of the marriage, especially when it comes to spending money for specific reasons. If you fear that such a thing can happen as your future partner has a higher pay scale than you, we strongly advise you to sort all these differences out before marriage. Make it clear that you will not tolerate such behavior and that it is your right to have equal say over purchases that you both will need to make.
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