Everyone wants to be strong and independent, but it’s not that simple to achieve, especially if you’ve been brought up in an environment where you were coddled constantly. However, you must realize that being independent is one of the most important qualities to possess in today’s world. Not only will it give you the freedom to do what you wish with your future, you will feel more satisfied with life too.
Dependence on others includes not just your partner but to your parents, extended family members, friends and colleagues. But what you need to learn is to rely on yourself by taking control of your life. That’s the only way you can learn how to be more independent in life. Leading a more independent life where you don’t rely on others to do or achieve things, takes some determination on your part. Plus a few tweaks to your current way of living.
Suggested read: 7 amazing tips on how to deal with rude people
Here are a few things you can do on your way to learning how to be more independent.
1. Earning more money.
Image source: Shutterstock
Money may cause all sorts of problems, but it is also very important to have if you want to be independent. Being financially independent gives you a sense of freedom that you won’t have if you’re dependent on someone else for money. Be it handouts from your parents or relying on your spouse to pay for all your expenses, try to break free from it all.
If you have a job but not financial independence, then perhaps it’s time you started thinking about another job which pays better, that will give you the chance to make more money. If you’re a stay-at-home parent who obviously doesn’t have time or energy for a 9 to 5 job, then you may consider taking up something part-time or even a work from home option.
2. Solving your own problems.
Who doesn’t have problems? What do you do when you do encounter a problem? Run to your partner/parent/sibling/friend? If so, then stop it this instant! The next time you have a problem, try to solve it on your own. It’s an opportunity for you to stop being dependent on others whenever you find yourself in a bind. If you can, try and do everything to keep it under wraps, so that you can deal with it in your own way, at your own pace, provided it isn’t time-sensitive. Take others’ help only if you absolutely need to.
Granted that there’s nothing wrong with asking for help when you need it, but it becomes a problem if you do that every time some issue crops up. How will you be independent if you rely on others to help solve your problems every single time? If you make this a habit, then you’ll never be able to become the strong, independent person you want to be.
3. Set realistic goals.
Image source: Pixabay, under Creative Commons License
One sure way of being more independent is to set realistic, achievable goals for yourself. The more attainable the goal, the more likely you will be able to succeed in it on your own, without having to rely on others to help you out. Put in all your efforts and hard work, and always keep your eye on the prize. Hard work and sincere effort will never go to waste. You will succeed.
Setting realistic goals doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dream. It just means that for your dreams to become a reality, you need to break it down into achievable parts, that will one day come to fruition. This is an important habit of independent people.
4. Accepting failure sportingly.
Success and failure are the two sides of the same coin. You can’t have one without the other. It’s natural to seek succor and support from loved ones when you fail. But if you truly want to be independent, you need to start taking both success and failure in stride. It’s a universal truth that when you succeed in something, you take on an independent outlook on life, while your dependence on others for sympathy and succor are inherent in failure.
This is only human tendency, but if you truly want to be more independent, then you have to accept that life is full of ups and downs, wins and losses, successes and failures. Losing comes with the territory, and that you have to learn to deal with it. Whining about your failure or expecting others to help you out won’t truly make you independent, would it? Take responsibility for your own actions. Now that is what being independent is all about.
Suggested read: The complete guide on how to be perfect in everything you do
5. Stand your ground.
Image source: Shutterstock
What do you believe in? What do you stand for? One way to be more independent in life is to stand your ground and figure out what your beliefs are. One reason why children rely on their parents, romantic partners rely on their lovers, and friends share a bond together is because more often than not, they share the same views and beliefs on life, or at the very least, are aligned in principle.
If you just follow what your parents or your partner believes in, there’s no room for you and your own set of beliefs. You’re just depending on their beliefs, without even thinking it through if you even agree with them. You need to have your own viewpoints, beliefs, and thoughts if you are to be more independent. If these don’t fall in line with your loved ones, but you still stand your ground, then it’ll show them that you’re ready to take on the world, if need be, to protect what you believe in. Challenging the norm (if you truly believe that it is worth it) and thinking outside the box will gain you independence in no time.
6. Widening your social circle.
Image source: Pixabay, under Creative Commons License
If you stick to your old friends and acquaintances, you’ll never move out of your comfort zone at all. You need to widen your social circle by meeting a variety of new people, talking with them, interacting with them, discussing things with them, and forging new connections. Spending time and energy to get to know someone new is never a waste of time.
Also, the wider your social circle, the more opportunities you will get to participate in newer activities and discuss viewpoints that you’re usually not used to. Isn’t this the perfect opportunity for you to grow into a stronger, well-rounded, and independent person? Doesn’t that sound nice?
7. Getting your own place.
Are you living with your parents? Still? Even though you go around town telling everyone and their uncle that you’re “independent”? If you are, then you’re a hypocrite! Don’t take advantage of your parents; get your own place. In certain circumstances, it’s okay to live with them. Say, you’re saving up to move out since you’re in a tight financial spot, or you just lost your job because of the bad economy, or some such serious reason. But if not, then you’re just mooching off your parents, that’s NOT cool.
Save up and get your own place. You won’t have to answer to anyone, not your mom, not your dad, and certainly not your siblings, about how you manage your place. You’re the king/queen of your domain, and the feeling is nothing like you’ve ever imagined. Sure, it’ll take some getting used to. Paying the bills, doing your laundry, cleaning up, cooking, washing, and the all rest that accompany getting your own place. But trust me, it’ll be so worth it.
8. Asking for help, but not depending on it entirely
Image source: Pixabay, under Creative Commons License
While being independent is admirable, asking for help when you can’t handle it alone is not wrong either. Human beings are social animals, and hence need the support and strength that loved ones provide you when you’re taking on challenges. If you find yourself going in circles and can’t seem to find a way out however much you try to find one, get yourself out of that by asking for help. However, since you’re trying to be more independent, it’s wise to not depend totally on it.
If you know you have people and their help to fall back on, you’ll never do anything by yourself. You’ll always know that you won’t lose much even if you fail at something, because you have people to depend on. When you face a challenge, you need to take your dependence on others out of the equation and try to make it on your own. That’s when you’ll realize how hard it is to succeed and how much effort and work goes into make it alone. You’ll realize just how strong you are, when you try to rely on yourself.
Suggested read: 20 kickass tips o how to get motivated to work out and get fit
When all’s said and done, true independence is actually a reflection of how confident you are with your capabilities and how much you believe in yourself and in those capabilities. And you’re confident when you love yourself and know your worth. The stronger the feelings you have for yourself, the more independent you can be. Just knowing that you don’t need anybody’s approval or that you don’t need to rely anyone other than yourself will show you the way.
Going out of your comfort zone to truly be independent is not an easy task. But once you do it, it’ll make you so happy that you wouldn’t want to revert to the old you, for anything. Perseverance, hard work, and confidence in yourself are all that are needed to become independent. Go ahead and be the independent individual you always thought you could be.
Featured image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License
Facebook
Disqus
Google + 
