Being a woman in today’s world is admittedly better than being born 50 years ago in a world where the role of women in public life was completely denied. However, now that we can exercise basic human rights, sexism and misogyny have become an internalized mentality that is the norm in society, especially amongst men, and sadly, among a lot of women as well.
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Even though feminists have been fighting for equal rights for all, a lot of people misinterpret their struggle as a struggle to dominate over men. Even though this misinterpretation might seem like a legit cause for internalized misogyny, a lot of people do it even without a motive. No matter how progressive a country is, a woman in any part of the world is likely to face at least one instance of daily everyday sexism from their environment, whether it is on the road, in the company of friends and peers, or even at home.
Suggested read: #EverydaySexism: 10 Casually Sexist Remarks Women Are Tired Of Hearing
You might wonder what the point is of reading about instances of sexism. The purpose is to learn. Despite being aware women, sometimes the inherent patriarchy puts a blindfold on us, and we are unable to recognize when someone is being sexist or not, simply because that is what we are used to hearing for our entire lives. However, that doesn’t make these words and actions justifiable. In fact, the more you know about everything that sexism encompasses, the more you can fight it.
Here are 14 instances of everyday sexism that you can combat as a strong and aware woman:
1. The fact that wage gap exists
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A lot of men are determined to prove that the wage gap doesn’t exist. It is simply a feminist ploy to dominate over the corporate sector. This whole idea is absurd because in the U.S.A., which happens to be the most progressive country in the world, for every dollar that a man earns, a woman earns 76 cents for the same exact work. In countries like India, women earn 24% less than what men do for the same job.
The fact that it is even normal to expect women to get less for men, for the exact same work and the same amount of effort goes to show how inherent patriarchy and sexism works.
2. Designated professions for men and women
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One of the most common examples of everyday sexism occurs in the workplace, where centuries of stereotyping have confined men and women to certain gender roles which are now called professions. Thousands of women have spoken about how, despite being qualified techies, marines, professors, engineers and a million other things, people have been taken aback by their professions and sometimes even asked for men to help them out.
3. Being groped
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Very few women have the privilege of saying that they have never been groped. The fact that men think it is okay to touch women’s bodies without their consent, and do so without fear of being prosecuted, speaks volumes about the inherent sexism that people have ingrained in their minds. It is an invasion of private space and it is traumatizing for the woman, and it’s all because men can’t seem to keep it in their pants.
4. Calling emotional men “girls”
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In fact, any remark with the word “girl” in it is derogatory. Think about it- “you run like a girl,” “you cry like a girl”, “you scream like a little girl”, “you throw like a girl”- if you notice a pattern here, the term has almost become synonymous with weakness. It consolidates the stereotype that girls are meant to sit in pink fluffy rooms with princess castles and cry. That mental picture is very far from the actual reality that young girls are living in. The fact that they are used as an insult for “manly” men needs to change.
5. Slut-shaming
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The double standards that people have regarding the sexuality of men and women are one of the most common examples of sexism that women experience every day. The very idea that a man who has a host of girlfriends (sometimes at the same time) and brags about sleeping around with them is a stud and a player, while a woman who does the same is a slut, is pretty screwed up. It’s difficult to figure out how women are supposed to sleep with these studs, remain chaste and pure, and not be called a slut, all the same time.
6. Friend-zoning
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The fact that the friend-zone is an actual thing that people have gotten used to and make memes out of it, says a lot about the way people think and feel about women. The whole idea is based on the fact that women are supposed to be coy mistresses who accept all advances, and men do not take no for an answer. Friend-zoning a person means the woman didn’t feel the need to sleep with a particular person, which makes her a bitch, prude, etc.
Suggested read: 10 Excuses For Workplace Sexism That Need To Stop NOW
7. Being asked about marriage
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Even though being asked about marriage is a common occurrence, what makes it sexist is that people ask women when they are getting married, which implies that they have taken for granted the fact that they are obviously getting married. This stems from the idea that no matter how much a woman accomplishes, her identity and achievements begin and end with marriage.
8. Portrayal of women in media
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The use of women as sexual objects has been going on since mass media became a thing. Women are stripped naked, used as props, their body parts sexualized and their identities eradicated. In fact, the career of an actress is said to end after she turns 35, because after that she is considered too old, and too undesirable, while men have continued to work even in their 80s. Women are expected to look a certain way, to behave a certain way and to make their bodies available, an idea that is then broadcasted to billions of people worldwide.
9. Being confined to household roles…no matter where you are
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Cooking, cleaning up, taking care of people, are all examples of jobs women are supposed to take care of, no matter where they are. Any cooking or cleaning related issues are brought to women, and even if it something as simple as cutting and distributing cake amongst your peers in the office, it is likely that a woman will be asked to do it, simply because people have been unable to dissociate from the idea of women as housewives.
10. Paying for food at restaurants
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Have you noticed how when women are at a restaurant with a man, the waiter involuntarily hands the man the bill, and then hands him back the credit card, and completely ignores the women because obviously women can’t pay for themselves? Yeah. That’s sexism.
11. The taboo around breastfeeding and periods
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Whereas the very bodies of women are used to sell completely unrelated products like cars, beers, clothes, food, trainers, deodorant, etc. they are ostracized and humiliated for basic bodily functions like periods, and ironically, breastfeeding because these things aren’t sexual enough for the fantasies of society.
12. The word “girl”, “woman,” or “female” being used as a prefix
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Girl band, female comic, female doctor, women’s team, these are terms we have heard way too often because certain things are just not expected of girls, and when they do manage to prove people wrong, they are defined by their gender. Notice how a men’s band is a band, and a male doctor is a doctor and a men’s team is a team.
13. Literally, any comment about women’s weight
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When people say, “you’ve lost weight”, the automatic response is “thank you”. When people say “you have gained weight” your natural response is an excuse for gaining weight. Even though this is fat shaming, what makes it sexist is that everyone feels that they have the right to comment on women’s bodies, especially men, and make them feel bad about it, because women are supposed to look a certain way for them to be desirable by…you guessed it- men.
Suggested read: 26 Tweets That Show How Women Experience Sexual Harassment And Violence From An Early Age
14. High cost of maintenance and safety
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Sexism lies in the very fact that women have to shell out obscene amounts of money for their hygiene and safety. The worst part is, these are basic necessities that should ideally be made available for free. Things like bras, sanitary napkins and tampons, pepper sprays, etc. cost a fortune, while condoms are distributed for free. The fact that society thinks it is okay to commodify the basic needs of women shows how far it really is from treating men and women as equals.
Instances of causal sexism occur every day. As women, it is important to resist it, and if that is not possible under the circumstance, then to be aware of it at least, so that we don’t indulge in it ourselves.
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