Each and every one of us is unique in our own way, who have something distinctive to offer someone. But it’s not easy to attract and keep a guy that is RIGHT for you. You don’t want to attract just any guy, do you?
However, attracting the right guy isn’t about how skinny you are, how beautiful or pretty you are, how much of an outgoing person you are – although these matter too, in the long run, it’s what makes you YOU that will attract and hold a partner to be in a relationship with you. It’s quite easy to think to yourself that you’re not worthy, or you’re not interesting enough to hold a guy’s attention for long. That is total and utter and complete BS!
Suggested read: 11 surefire tips on how to rekindle your lackluster relationship
How to attract a guy and keep him around forever
Finding the man who is RIGHT for you isn’t that difficult. Here are a few essential dos and don’ts on how to attract a guy:
1. Do be self-confident.
Image source: Shutterstock
Confidence about your personality, your choices, your likes and dislikes, and yourself, are really attractive. If you know yourself, your self-confidence gets an instant boost that is pretty subconscious, and it’s sexy as all get out. Even if you don’t know who you are, or are trying to find yourself, it’s fine. Being on that path to self-discovery is a huge shot in the arm to your self-confidence.
Some men are intimidated by confident women, while others are attracted by it. You’re better off without the former, while the latter are who you should be looking at. Own your personality, your identity, yourself – and you will attract the right kind of person in your life in no time at all.
2. Do have a sense of humor.
Image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License
Having a sense of humor doesn’t mean you need to emulate Mindy Kaling or Amy Schumer or Tina Fey in real life. It just means that you need to take things lightly, be ready to not take life, and yourself, so seriously, all the damn time! Can you laugh at yourself? Self-deprecating humor is not everyone’s cup of tea. Only those who feel good about themselves are able to laugh at themselves.
Seeing the lighter side of things is another quality that is attractive to men (and women too!). Not everything in life goes according to plan. The ability to take it in stride, while being able to laugh it off is a great quality to have. Having fun, laughing, smiling, making jokes – are all attractive qualities for a man.
3. Do be happy.
Image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License
A happy person is like a magnet. They attract happiness, light-heartedness, and joviality like a flame drawing the moths. Happiness is infectious. You’d rather be with some who is happy, and thereby makes other feel good, rather than someone who complains and moans and whines through life. You should aspire to some who can laugh, have fun, be happy, and have a blast, rather than one who is a leech personified, who sucks the fun and laughter out of everything and everyone around them.
4. Do be interesting.
Are you excited by gossip? Are you on the lookout for someone else’s downfall? Then you should just forget about attracting a guy, let along keep him around for a long time. Gossipmongers, blabbermouths, and tattletales are not attractive. Instead, pick up a book, read a newspaper, join a hobby class, learn a new skill. These are all essentials that add new dimensions and facets to your personality. These aspects are what come out when you’re having a conversation with someone. If you’re just stuck talking about the seemingly never-ending closet space of one of the Kardashian sisters, then it’s not fun at all. Anybody would get bored to death of having a conversation with you.
5. Do be independent.
Independence for yourself, and not to attract a guy, should be your motivation. Sure, there are guys who want to play the knight in shining armor and take care of their damsel in distress. However, you ought to be the heroine in your own life, no? You should be able to take care of yourself, without needing a man to come to your rescue at every step of the way.
Sure, having a partner beside you, who’s there to cheer you and encourage you, is fine and dandy. But you need to have your own career, your own identity, your own money, your own life, besides merely being someone’s ‘wife,’ ‘girlfriend,’ or ‘spouse.’ You should want a man in your life, not need a man to make you or your life ‘complete.’ Your life should be complete on its own. A man would merely add a new perspective to your full, complete life, not be the other half of you. He’s your partner, an addition, not a fraction that makes you whole.
6. Do be kind.
Image source: Pixabay, under Creative Commons License
Kindness is attractive; it’s sexy. Not everyone is kind or compassionate. However, it’s an important trait to have, regardless of you trying to attract a guy or not. Nobody likes a mean, malicious, or scheming person. It’s not at all attractive. You could scheme and land a guy, but he won’t stay for long once he realizes your real personality.
Suggested read: 10 surefire tips on how to fall back in love with your partner
7. Do be empathetic.
This is an extension of the previous point. When you’re kind, you can identify and relate to other people’s pain, feelings, emotions, and experiences. Empathetic people are hard to come by, but sympathy and compassion should come naturally. This is one of those traits that is inculcated in a person from their childhood. Even if your childhood was different, you can always practice being sympathetic – genuinely.
8. Do be genuine and real.
Image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License
Fake, unreal women aren’t attractive. Being fake isn’t sustainable. Be your unique self, however strong, flawed, or imperfect you might think you are. Being your real and genuine self is what is attractive to men. Sure, you might get a man due to your fake self, but sooner or later, your real self will emerge, and since it doesn’t compute with your fake persona, he’ll walk. Be yourself from the very beginning. If he doesn’t like it, then it’s his loss. Find someone else who likes you for YOU, not a fake you.
9. Do be open-minded.
Are you up for new things, new experiences? Having an open-mind helps with this. You know, change is the only constant there is in life. If you don’t change, you stagnate, and that’s not a good place to be in. You need to grow, evolve, and continually try to better yourself. If that means trying newer things, experiencing things out of your comfort zone, so be it. Give things a shot, before shooting them down.
10. Do be vulnerable.
Image source: Pixabay, under Creative Commons License
This is a hard pill to swallow. Nobody wants to show their weaknesses to another person. However, for someone to get to know the real, genuine you, then you need to let your guard down and let them in. It’s not healthy to keep everything inside. You need to let things out, talk, communicate, and share your thoughts, feelings, and emotions with your partner to let them know the real you.
11. Do take care of yourself.
This in no way means you need to become a size zero stick figure, or wear tons of makeup. It just means keep fit by exercising regularly, so that you are in good health. And do this for yourself, and not for someone else. Another aspect of this is to love yourself the way you are, which translates to how happy you are and feel. Take care of yourself physically, mentally, and spiritually, and it will translate to your external happiness. A happy mind in a happy body is so true!
12. Don’t be needy/clingy.
Image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License
Your confidence will shoot down your neediness. Neediness, most often, stems from an innate inadequacy that you feel, where you think you’re not good enough, or worthy enough. Thus, you seek constant validation and appreciation. It can get exhausting quickly. Sure, everyone needs validation from their peers, friends, colleagues, and their loved ones. But if this crosses a certain point, into neediness and clinginess, it’s not at all attractive. In fact, it’s a downer. It’s annoying, actually.
Suggested read: 12 superb tips on how to spoon to boost intimacy
13. Don’t chase him.
Chasing a man, despite knowing he’s not interested, isn’t at all attractive. Genetically speaking, men are hardwired to chase women, because they’re hunters, while women are gatherers. However sexist this may sound, it’s a biological truth that needs a few million centuries to change. So give in to your biological urge to be selective in your mate, while men do all the chasing. Do not lower your standards just because you’ve reached a ‘certain’ age or time in your life. Because YOU need to be happy with yourself and your life; nobody else.
These are the only 13 tips you need to know about how to attract a guy and keep him around for long. See, it’s not that difficult at all!
Featured image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License
Facebook
Disqus
Google + 
