The allure of beauty lies in its brevity. Looks and physical attraction are what draw us to a person initially, but it is ultimately their personality that makes us stay. It is what’s beneath that surface of perfect teeth, flawless skin, and exceptional body that defines who we truly are. Of course, our first impression of people is based on their physical appearance, but like they say – there is more to a person than meets the eye.
While the society favors those who are on the more attractive side physically, it is our personality that takes us to the places we truly want to go and helps us fulfill our goals. It may be easy to perfect the way you look, but honing your personality requires a lot more work. In order to make that mental connection happen with someone, you need to have an attractive personality. That’s all one has when external beauty fades away (as it is expected to).
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How to have an attractive personality
To help you in your quest for a better, more interesting, and attractive personality, here are 12 tips on how to have an attractive personality that are sure to be of some help:
1. Cultivate a good sense of humor
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A good sense of humor automatically makes someone all the more attractive than they already are. The skill of being able to make people laugh is not an easy one to hone, and most are unable to differentiate that fine line between hilarious and downright offensive. While it is healthy to have some good banter with people, make sure you don’t hurt their sentiments or make a joke about something they are insecure about. On the other hand, self-deprecating humor is often the best way to cope with your own insecurities, share a good laugh with people, and it keeps you grounded too. What could possibly be funnier than the deep dark pit of despair in your soul, am I right?
2. Be respectful of others’ opinions
While discussions about various topics, controversial and otherwise, should be encouraged and participated in; you must be respectful of other people’s opinions. We are all individuals in this world and no two people are the same – difference of opinions is bound to happen. It is so not cool when people try to impose their opinions and disregard others completely. It’s not necessary for the person to feel the same way about your favorite movie; it’s also okay for them to dislike it completely. But it’s definitely not okay for you to treat their opinion as invalid or look down upon them just because they don’t conform to yours. Quit arguing and trying to change their opinion, it’s not attractive.
3. Read books
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Believe it or not but the books we read go a long way in shaping our personalities and the kind of people we turn out to be. Not only do books help cultivate an active imagination and improve vocabulary, but they also make you a better, more attractive person. Books teach us to see things not from one but several perspectives; they teach us values and lessons we probably didn’t ever learn at school; and make us into considerate, mature human beings capable of living a worthwhile life. Also, there’s nothing more attractive than a man or a woman who can quote Shakespeare whilst taking you out for a drink.
4. Don’t be cocky
While confidence is attractive, cockiness most definitely is not. There is a fine line between the two, and one must always be aware of it. When you exude an air of confidence, you attract more people; cockiness will only repel them. Self-love and awareness of one’s talents are great for the growth of your personality, but vanity is not. Modesty is virtue and you must learn to be a grounded person.
5. Indulge in a hobby
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An attractive personality is one that has a good number of interests and is passionate about things in life. A hobby is an excellent way of spending your free time and it adds more depth to your personality. The best part is that one can be passionate about anything and everything; it could be reading, playing a musical instrument, collecting stamps, bird-watching, gardening, or even something absolutely disturbing like collecting human body parts. Haha, I’m only joking. The key to having an interesting hobby is to find something you’re passionate about and are willing to devote some time to. It’s also an amazing way of meeting new people – reach out to people who share the same hobbies as you do and connect with them; you could even start a little club together. This is a complete win-win situation.
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6. Be a good listener
In order to get to know people and for them to know you, you must be a good listener. There are plenty of people in this world who can step up to share an opinion or two, but very few who can actually listen. People are often attracted to those who can lend an ear and listen to their rants and musings. Show them you’re listening and that you care about what they have to say, ask questions and make appropriate remarks whenever is expected of you. People will feel comfortable around you and will be able to open up more freely if you show them that you are a good listener.
7. Be enthusiastic
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While thinking about the futility of life and the inevitability of death might be fun for you, people don’t always enjoy individuals who are perpetually broody and pessimistic. It’s okay to be introverted, but in order to be liked by people, you must show them how fun and interesting you can be. Be open to trying new things – whether it’s a movie from a genre you don’t particularly fancy or a new, exotic dish that has piqued your interest. Be spontaneous; go out and live your life the way you want to once in a while – sticking to a plan may not always be fun. Having that spark of adventure in you makes your personality an attractive one. Moreover, people like being with those who can be pleasant company; who enjoy having a good time and are not afraid to be a little weird.
8. Be truthful
Always try to present your most honest opinion forward to people. It gives them a clear idea of the kind of person you are. No one likes to be fooled. If you try to be someone you’re not, just so you can impress people and catch their attention, then I can assure you that this will end in nothing short of failure. Be unafraid to be who you truly are as a person; there will always be someone who dislikes you but you weren’t put on this earth to impress each and every single person you meet. The least you can do for yourself and the people who do like you is to be truthful. Be true to yourself and others.
9. Be kind
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One of the sure ways on how to have an attractive personality is to be kind. The world would be a lot more pleasant to be in with some kindness. There is a glaring dearth of kind people in this society and we are reminded of its lack almost every day. There’s always a shooting or a bomb blast in some part of the world. People commit hate crimes and hold prejudices just because other people aren’t exactly the same as they’d like them to be. There are people doing terrible things to each other for something as trivial as a cartoon or a harmless joke which meant to offend none. In such a cruel world, you can try to be that much-needed ray of sunshine. It’s nice to do things for other living beings, really. Help out your mum with her chores, help your friend study a subject they’re not too good at, give an extra treat to that puppy out on the street. A little bit of kindness never hurt anyone, did it?
10. Be aware of your surroundings
While it’s definitely nice to be in a world of your own, being clueless all the time is not something people desire. Ignorance may be bliss but knowledge is power. Make an effort to know what is going on around you – keep yourself updated about important events and news happening around the world. Not only will it help you start a conversation with people, it will also make people think that you actually care about the world you had the privilege of existing in.
11. Self-exploration
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Before you become an attractive personality, it is important that you know who you truly are. Introspection often brings to light certain aspects of ourselves which we never really knew we possessed. Indulge in some alone time and get to know yourself – your tastes, preferences, likes as well as dislikes. Only then will you be able to present yourself to others as a wholesome individual.
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12. Accept your flaws
Perfection is an illusion. Nothing in this universe is absolutely perfect, and neither are you. The sooner one accepts that, the more at peace they will be in life. Be comfortable with the person you are; flaws and all. Stop obsessing over minutiae of yourself which you think are flawed. You are so much more than the aspects of yourself that you are insecure about. Until and unless you are contented with the person you are, how can you expect the same from others?
At the end of the day, we are all individuals and no two individuals can ever be the same. We are all unique, attractive, and interesting in our own quirky ways. One must never feel the need to change aspects of themselves just to fit a stereotype set by the society and to fulfill society’s expectations of us. It is our faults, idiosyncrasies, flaws, and our quirks that make each one of us distinct and special in our own ways. In the quest for the ideal personality, one must remember not to lose their true selves and their true purpose in life.
Featured image source: Pixabay, under Creative Commons License
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