If you and your partner have decided to live together, you have decided to take your relationship to the next level, which is infinitely more serious than the previous level. A lot of couples are under the impression that if they have been together for a decent amount of time, then moving in together is no problem at all. In fact, they are stoked about the prospect of spending most of their time together, and living together. However, things are not as easy as they sound.
A lot of couples have broken up after they have started to live together. In fact, moving in together is advisable before you actually get married to the person, after which you have to live together, so that you know everything about their lifestyle and habits. If you have decided to move in with your partner, then it is likely that you have done so after considering all the pros and cons of the arrangement.
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After you have prepared yourself mentally to move in together with your partner, and they have done the same, you have to take care of certain other practical aspects of a live in relationship. You have to keep in mind that after you move out of your old house, you will have to assume certain adult responsibilities, and even deal with things that you never thought about before, in terms of logistics.
Here are 12 practical things that you need to take into consideration before you actually move in together.
1. Choose your new location very carefully
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This is one of the primary things you have to take care of, before you decide to move in with your partner. If you live alone, or if your partner lives alone, then it might be logical to assume that you will either move into their apartment, or they will move into yours. However, you have to check whether it is close to certain places that you access on a regular basis such as the grocery store, your workplace, etc. If it isn’t, it is best if you find a separate place, which is convenient for the both of you.
2. Discuss your financial situation
When you have decided on moving in together, you have reached that point in the relationship, where you can be absolutely transparent with each other. It is not an anomaly if one partner earns more than the other. Before you actually start living together, you have to understand the income and expenditure details of each other, so that you can plan your daily expenses and other finance-related issues, without any nasty surprises, or stress on your bank balance.
3. Decide on how you will split your expenses
Once you have discussed your income and the amount that you spend, you have to talk about how you are going to split things like electricity bills, rents, loans and mortgages, groceries and the like. Once you start living together, you have to pay a lot of people and services, so it is best if you divide this amongst yourselves before you actually move in.
4. Start saving up on your rent
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Your rent might be an additional expense that you have to bear after you move in together. It is best if you start saving up for your rent at least 3 to 4 months in advance of your move, so that when you do have to pay your rent, you don’t have to subtract a sizeable portion of your previous month’s salary. Also, in case you need to move out of your new place sooner than you expected, or if you have to deal with emergencies, then you will have a backup fund to help you out.
5. Change your mailing address at least a month in advance
This will save you a lot of trouble later on. If you think a month is too much and that you might miss important letters and bills during the course of that month, you can always depend on your partner or even your landlord to keep them for you, instead of having to run around trying to redirect you mail after you have moved in to your new home.
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6. Use your discretion when you are packing for the big move
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Packing for the big move is a very important practical consideration. It is absolutely unnecessary to pack every single thing you own and had in your previous house. This is also a great chance to get rid of the things that you have stored away and then never used. Take only the things that you absolutely need.
7. Spend a week together before you move in
Before you finally decide to move in together, it is important to do a trial run, so that you know what it feels like to actually spend time with each other on a regular and daily basis. You can either go for a week long holiday together, or even live together for a week before you decide to completely uproot your old life and move in together. This will give you a fair idea about what it feels like to live with them, so that you don’t have to encounter any nasty surprises.
8. Have a backup plan, in case it doesn’t work out
This sounds like a damper, especially when the idea of moving in together feels like a dream. However, a lot of the times, moving in together can also be an eye opener. You might realize things about the person you are living with, which you never knew before, and you may not always like surprises like these. In case you want to move out of your new house and your new circumstances (in case of a breakup), make sure that you have a backup option, where you can go to, and not end up on the streets.
9. Create a schedule for the chores
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Before you move in with your partner, make a list of all the chores and duties that you need to do for the house, and divide them amongst yourselves. Even if you are not an organized person in general, it is important to be a little organized when you are taking a step as big as this. This will ensure that you fight a lot less about who is to do what, for you have already demarcated your duties before you move in. This is preparation 101 for harmonious living.
10. Give your partner a heads up about your habits
One of the leading reasons why couples who are in a live in relationship breakup is the nasty surprises that they have to face about their partner and the inability of either to compromise and adjust. So that you don’t become one of those couples, one thing that you need to do before you move in with your partner is sit them down and tell them about all the bad habits, and even the weird ones that you have, so that they are prepared to handle anything that living with you entails. In fact, this will encourage them to open up about themselves as well, and both of you can come to a compromise about the things that you will have to adjust with, and things that need to change, instead of putting each other on the spot.
11. Go shopping for things for your new home together
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This is also a great way to start taking the responsibilities that come with moving in to a new home with the person that you love. When you shop for things like cutlery, curtains, bed sheets, and clothes with each other, you create an environment where the two of you learn to function together and take important decisions. Also, when you buy things for your house together, both the partners in the relationship feel homeliness and love and attachment towards the establishment that you both will share in the future.
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12. Create your own personal space in the house
Why would you need your own personal space when you move in together with the person you are super comfortable with and the person you love most in the world? This is a valid question but trust me, once you get used to living with each other, you might want your own personal space, where you can keep your special belongings, do your work, and even relax when you need to. This does not signify boundaries or distances. It merely allows you a space where you can be your own person and not feel overwhelmed by your partner’s presence when you are living with them.
After you have taken these basic things into consideration, you can move in with your partner, so that you can experience a joyful, stress-free, and mutually rewarding live in relationship, which leads to a potential life together.
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