Queen Bey asked, “Who run the world,” and we all screamed in delighted unison, “GIRLS!” Yet, here we are, sad, single, lonely, and chasing after men, who will eventually make us sadder and lonelier. After careful self-evaluation, I realized that there are a ton of other things in the world us single ladies (another smooth Queen Bey reference) could be chasing instead of these mistakes we call men, because we are strong, independent and a hell lot more fun when we are not worried about impressing men and satisfying their egos. Don’t get me wrong, I am no man hater. However, the problem lies in the fact that even when we are free from men, that is, super single in life, we are dependent on them to love us and send us sappy goodnight texts at night.
Why though? I for one know for a fact that men can be hella cribby and entail more drama than all my girlfriends put together, which is why you could do so much better by chasing so many more amazing, productive things in the world.
Suggested read: 15 amazing things you MUST do when you’re single
Here are some examples you could be chasing instead of chasing a man:
1. Your dream job
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If you are as yet unemployed, or stuck in a job you pretty much hate with gusto, you could spend time chasing that dream job that you have been thinking about since you were 16. Some important person said that you should do what you love instead of trying to love what you do, because the latter is much more difficult to achieve in life. Spend all the time and energy that you would have otherwise spent on trying to keep your man happy, in trying to get that job which has always been a distant dream.
2. A promotion in your current job
With relationship comes responsibility and a lot of time that you can waste which you could have otherwise spent on self-improvement. Instead of working your ass off for a person who might or might not be there for you a couple of years down the line, work towards getting that promotion in your workplace, which will catapult you to previously unknown levels of awesomeness.
3. New friends
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It’s a great feeling when you have a boyfriend who will cuddle you and whisper sweet nothings into your ears. However, it is even better when you have your girlfriends to look out for you and party with. I mean who wouldn’t want to have to have a squad like Taylor Swift’s. Not only will it make for great Instagram pictures, but it will also give you friends, who are infinitely more tolerable than a lover. Go out and become a more sociable person instead of swiping sadly through Tinder.
4. The latest sale in your favorite store
Unleash the restrained shopaholic inside you and own the latest sale that is going on in your favourite retail store. There is nothing more satisfying, giving and therapeutic than shopping, and there is no better way to distract single women from their futile quest for the perfect man. You can chase all the sales that are going on or are going to take place in your city, and lo behold- you have the perfect place to spend your savings on, with more permanent and satisfying results.
5. That bucket list that you have tucked away at the back of your cupboard
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A lot of movies talk about living your dream before it is too late and ticking off things from your bucket list. In fact, it is best if you have your bucket list made decade-wise, so that you have a set number if things that you can and want to achieve in your 20s and then your 30s, etc. if you don’t have a bucket list, there is no time better than now to sit and jot down all the things you have always wanted to do and do them without being tied down by someone, like, I don’t know, a boyfriend. Yuck.
6. Food
Okay, seriously though, if you miss orgasms, just go have a large cheese burger or a dessert that could feed a small country and you will be sorted. There is nothing more satisfying than food, which is why, instead of chasing men, you should be chasing the restaurant that offers the best buffets, that has the best dessert menu and indulge in your favorite bottle of wine now and then. When you have so many things which will make you close your eyes and moan, the need for a man becomes completely redundant.
Suggested read: 9 compelling reasons why people fear being single
7. A healthier lifestyle
Use the time and the energy that you spend chasing after men, to chase after a healthier lifestyle by exercising and indulging in the kind of workout that you like doing, whether it is Zumba or yoga or pilates or a run at the gym. (Also, if you have noticed I have carefully avoided the issue of eating healthy and avoiding junk because I believe that you should eat whatever the hell you want). However, working out should make you look and feel as healthy as you want, which means you are going to look like a million bucks and when you look great, you feel great as well, which is when you don’t need a man telling you that they think you’re pretty because you know you are. #win
8. Pokémons
Honestly, it is more rewarding to download Pokémon Go and chase Pokémon’s. This is a serious occupation and if you are half as passionate about Pokémon’s as I am (because childhood bro) then instead of downloading Tinder and Fling and the thousand other dating apps, download Pokémon Go and become a Pokémon Master. Battle all the gyms in your city and catch all these elusive Pokémon’s and become a hero for all your friends. The prestige of that is much greater than the validation of a man in your life, honestly.
9. A brand new hobby
Image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License
I know this is slightly clichéd, but it is a great feeling when you pick up a completely new hobby at the ripe old age of so-and-so and excel at it. Soon, because of your fragile state of mind and your life which you think is in shambles, your new “hobby” will become an obsession. I don’t mean lame things like reading books and things like that because you developed those hobbies when you were 5. You can maybe try to learn a new language or a musical instrument or two and find out about talents you never knew you possessed, which will make you feel like an accomplished human being, instead of feeling like a loser who chases after men who never seem to give them attention.
10. Achieving peace of mind
Inner peace. Zen. Moksha. Nirvana. Enlightenment. Contentment. These are things Buddha and Jesus and all these people said not because they wanted to be cool, but because these things actually matter. In a world where everyone is trying to convince you that single women are handicapped women because “omg what is a woman without a man”, you have to search for ways in which you can achieve inner peace. Whether it is by meditation or by watching TV shows, you should chase after the goal of becoming the source of your own happiness and consequently harbour inner peace. You’ll feel so much better about yourself.
11. Becoming a better person
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Single women do not understand that their singlehood is actually a blessing in disguise. It might seem super difficult at first, but it is the ideal opportunity to concentrate on yourself, pamper yourself and work towards making yourself a better person. Use this time to focus on your other relationship, such as with your family and with your old friends who drifted out of your life because you were too busy. These are the relationships that ultimately matter, so instead of wallowing about not having a man in your life, work towards becoming a better person for yourself and for others.
Suggested read: 23 simple ways to love yourself every single day
I know, from personal experience, how difficult it is to be single and take things positively because you have known the joys of being in a relationship with a person you love, and even if you haven’t, you have seen others feel it and you want your share of it too. However, my point Is, that should not be the only or rather, pre-dominant driving force in your life. If you feel like you should stick your tongue out and scream “I hate boys!” like you did when you were 12, and that should help you move away from the constant urge to find a boyfriend, then go right ahead and do it.
The point is you are adequate and independent and strong and talented which is why the last thing you should be doing is chasing a man and pining away for him who might or might not be the right one. When you work towards self-improvement, the right one will automatically gravitate towards you, which is why it is of the utmost importance that you become a Pokémon master first.
Featured image source: Pixabay, under Creative Commons License
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