The people we once fall in love with, leave a lasting impression on us. It becomes almost impossible to get them out of our head when we need to move on, right?
Have you ever been so distracted by even the thought of someone that it seems crazy to work or study or do anything, for that matter? Well, there is nothing to worry about. You haven’t lost it or anything! There is no need to panic or go for a check-up! You are just infatuated about someone, and so your mind is preoccupied by thoughts of them.
Suggested read: How to fall out of love with someone when there’s no future
Why do people get lovesick about someone?
When you have eyes for someone, it is very difficult to not notice everything that is connected to them. The moments you spent with them, their qualities, their little quirks, the things they do to make you laugh, the things they do that melts your heart, and even the places that you have visited with them; every single detail swirls around in your head and heart!
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If the relationship were going strong, these thoughts would be pleasant reminders of how lucky you are to have this person in your life and how much you love them. As such, they would be more than welcome. When things are not going according to you, however, and all you want is to move on, these thoughts can serve as needless disturbances.
I can understand that you want to relive the happy moments you have spent with this person, over and over again, in your head, but along with these, depressing thoughts show up, uninvited, and that’s when the problem starts. You wonder how to get someone out of your head. Your head tells you that you need to detox your life, and throw this person out of your life, but your heart? It remains stubborn, and doesn’t want you to forget them.
In this tug of war between the head and the heart, you are the one who suffers.
But now that you have decided to listen to your head, ignoring the amount of affection you have for this person, let us tell you everything you need to know on how to get someone out of your head.
How to get someone out of your head
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Most people in your life, particularly your friends, considering how objectively they can view your situation, will advise you to stop thinking about this person, because that is an easy thing to do. They will tell you that to forget someone, you just need to stop thinking about them, and sooner or later, you will! They are right, but only partially. If you are planning to get someone out of your head just by not thinking about them, expect several years to pass by before you actually start forgetting this person! For something quicker, read on.
The way suggested by your friends and close ones can only work faster, if you get amnesia or something! The memory of this person’s existence is engraved in your heart and mind, and erasing that cannot be done superfluously.
So if ‘forgetting about them’ does not help, what does? You will have to go the traditional way, that is, get over this person.
How long will it take for me to get over someone?
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I knew this was coming! Everybody who is trying to get over someone wants to know the exact number of days, months, years, it will take for them to actually make that happen. Most relationship advisors will tell you that the process depends on how intimate you and this person were, or the kind of mind-set you have and so on.
If you are planning to listen to these people, buddy, you are up for some serious disappointment! Science speaks that there are two possible theories regarding how long it can take to get someone out of our head: One, it takes 18 months approx., for a divorced couple to get over each other; two, it takes 3 months for people in a regular relationship.
Remember, these are standardized timeframes achieved by carrying out surveys involving only a minuscule of the general population.
No matter how long it takes, the good news is that you can ease the process, and also speed it up. There are a few exercises that can help to get someone out of your head and move on. Scroll down for these exercises!
Suggested read: This is how you will get over him, based on YOUR Zodiac sign
Exercises to get over someone
Fret not. We won’t shove the same love yourself, distract yourself with a little help from your friends, and find a new leisure pursuit run-around! You know about all those things already, and yet you have found your way to this article. You are still on the lookout for something that will actually help you find a different, and hopefully, effective remedy.
Well, thank you for dropping by. Let’s see what can be done here. Here are 10 tips, more like stages, where each stage aims to help you achieve some semblance of normality within your thoughts!
1. Ask yourself why is it that you are holding on
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And be honest when you answer. Here are a few questions that can help you get to the root of it:
- “Does this person treat you in a bad way, consistently?”
- “Has he or she moved on, and that bothers you?”
- “Have your other relationships also not worked out in the past?”
- “Do other factors make your relationship with this person impractical? Say, your parents, or children or religion or the society etc.?”
2. Get rid of all the physical memories and mementos
All their belongings have to be removed today. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, they say. But they don’t stress over how too much absence can help you get someone out of your head!
3. Play a game of association
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The association game helps you trick your mind into lumping this person, you are trying to get over, into a category that is bad or one that you don’t like. It helps you think about only those things about this person that you don’t miss or that you don’t find attractive.
4. Installing the association game into your system
Whenever you think of this person, your mind should automatically redirect you to all the bad things about them. This bad habit of theirs should be the first thing that pops into your mind when you think of them. Constantly practice this game, until it becomes natural for you to not like this person anymore.
5. Avenge yourself, if need be
Relax! It does not mean that you need to do something really harsh, physically! You just have to show this person that you don’t care anymore. Just be your normal self. Put a full stop in trying to impress them, like you used to in the past. In its place, start doing the things that you have always wanted to do, say, simple things like wearing the clothes you have always wanted to wear, going on an all-bros or only girls night-out, watching the kind of movies you enjoy, etc.
6. A getaway should be good at this stage!
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You don’t have to go somewhere far, if that seems impractical. But if you are up for some place far away, consider India or South America. A lot of people are known to travel to these places to reinvent themselves, and get over someone. We are not suggesting a getaway as a distraction. It is an opportunity to create new memories which will replace the old ones, since the brain can only hold a fixed number of bytes of memories. 
7. Avoid being with this person
This is a way of telling your body and mind that there are other people on this planet who demand your immediate attention! There is no point to force your world to revolve around this person.
8. Ignore them
Try not to even look in their direction, or even talk to them. Controlling your thoughts is next to impossible, but not noticing someone or ignoring them, isn’t! Try to arrest your thoughts on other things and other people. Go with the flow!
9. Play another game: The Punishment Game
Tie a rubber band around the wrist. Each time you think of this person, snap yourself with the rubber band. Every obsession is a habit, which can be reduced by designing a way of punishing yourself whenever you repeat it!
Suggested read: 13 most effective tips on how to forget someone you once loved
10. Cease to be their ‘friend’ on social media
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We see people more often on social media sites than in real life. Blocking someone from your FB account, or Instagram feed can really give you the space you need to get over them.
Like I have already told you, you can only stop thinking about someone completely if you get your brain damaged or go under hypnosis, forever! The above steps on how to get someone out of your head will not make you forget about the person completely, but make sure that the thoughts of them aren’t painful to bear. Once this happens, you are ready to ensue change and happiness into your life.
With all the time that you will save by getting over this person, start thinking about yourself instead! Love yourself.
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