If you have decided that it is time for you to start dating (or dating again), then you have graduated to a more mature state of mind where you are ready to take on the responsibility for another individual. However, dating is not as easy and laidback as we are shown in the movies, where the guy gets to sweep the girl off her feet after one date and get married the next week. There are some things every man should know before dating and keep in mind to avoid messing up in the future. Here are some handy pointers for when you are attempting to date without disaster.
Suggested read: 10 things every man should know before committing in a relationship
1. Be introspective
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This is a more personal pointer rather than a practical one. Even if you have decided that you are now ready to date, you have to make sure that you understand what you demand from a relationship. Take time out before you start dating, and preferably write down the things that you look for when you meet a girl, as well as the characteristics that you want your future partner to possess. This might seem lame and over-enthusiastic on your part, but after you meet your date, taking decisions about your future together will become a whole lot easier when you have that list in mind.
2. Always make the first move
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This is one of those things that men should know. While it is no longer an unspoken rule that men have to make the first move, why not? Whether it is asking her out on a date, or calling her afterwards, it is important that you know that even if girls want to call you desperately after your date, they will patiently wait for you to do so first. So if you are planning to call her, or ask her out again, do not be afraid to do so thinking you will come across as over-imposing and clingy, because you will not. It just shows your interest in her and taking the budding relationship to the next level.
3. You are dating, not asking her to marry you
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Most men tend to avoid being in a relationship or even dating because they are afraid of commitment. Even if their friends do force them out on a date, they tend to mess up and say all the wrong things because they are just that nervous around people of the opposite sex. However, one of the things every man should know is that you are going out on a date; not asking her to marry you. So there is no need to be panic-stricken in the attempt to be perfect on your date. The whole purpose of dating is to get to know the other person and see whether they are compatible with you and whether you enjoy each other’s company. That’s it!
4. Flowers are never “too much” or “too cheesy”
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It is essential that you bring something for the person that you are going out on a date with, whether you are meeting them for the first time or if you have known them forever. You don’t have to invest in expensive gifts if that is what you are afraid of. However, getting flowers is both safe and thoughtful. Whether she likes the flowers or not is not the issue, because you are not expected to know. But it is the thought that counts, and rest assured, if you get her a bunch of daisies or a single rose, she is not going to burst into tears.
Suggested read: 10 common mistakes ALL women make in a relationship
5. Ask her about her life
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There are a number of reasons why men tend to go on and on about their lives, their achievements, and worst of all, their ex-girlfriends, when they are on a date. Perhaps the most crucial rule here is to never bore your date, and one of the ways you can ruin the occasion is by going on and on about yourself. It may not always be intentional – you might find yourself yammering on about all the wrong things out of nervousness. But when you date, you have to allow your partner to open up about themselves as well, and pay attention to everything that they have to say.
6. Learn to speak respectfully
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When you are going out on a date, try to avoid the casual, devil-may-care attitude that you think girls find cool. Trust me, they don’t. Irrespective of whether you are going out with a girl for the first time, or if you have finally mustered the courage to ask out an old friend you have had the hots for, you have to behave and talk respectfully on your date. After all, everyone goes out hoping that it might lead to another one and then something more, and for that, you have to first speak respectfully to not only the girl you’re with, but everyone else you meet during the date. This is not only one of those things to know before dating, but something you should practice all the time, irrespective of who you’re with.
7. Choose your words carefully
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Choosing your words carefully does not mean thinking a hundred times before you say something. However, it is important to be considerate of her feelings. For example, if you are going out for dinner together or for a social gathering and she is trying on dresses, and she asks you how she looks, then there is only one answer to that question. Even if you don’t have to measure your words at all times, there is no need to hurt your girl unnecessarily, or get her worked up. This holds true for not only when you are on a first date, but the rest of your relationship as well.
8. Do not forget your friends after you start dating
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If you have a successful first date, then it is more than likely that you will go into a proper, long-term relationship with that person. However, one bad habit that people tend to have when they are in a new relationship is forgetting the rest of the people in their lives, because they are, in short, obsessed with their new partner. It is important to not let your girlfriend become the only person in your life. Your friends and family will stick with you throughout your life no matter what, but your girlfriend may not if the relationship takes a bad turn, and we don’t mean to sound unnecessarily discouraging. You will want to play the replacement game, but try to refrain.
9. Do not take things too quickly
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If you have gone out on a date with her, and you have enjoyed spending time with her, do not try to push your affections on her immediately, especially if it is sexual. If you two are meant to be, then things will move on gradually and by themselves, without you shoving them along. In fact, if you become over-ambitious and over-enthusiastic, then you might end up scaring her away. First spend time getting to know each other, and figuring out whether you have found a connection between you, rather than trying to get in her pants.
Suggested read: 10 warning signs you’re in the wrong relationship
10. You have to be affectionate, rather than buying her affection
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Many men are under the impression that all girls want is a rich husband/boyfriend with a respectable social standing who will be able to give them the promise of a secure tomorrow. But when you are dating someone, you have to emotionally provide for them as well, and show them that you care for them and love them, instead of showering them with expensive gifts. Trust me when I say doing the former is more of a challenge, and it should be one that you are up for.
There are a number of reasons why men find all possible excuses not to date other people. If you have been able to get past all those reasons and decided to date, then you are ready to take responsibility for another individual in your life, which is good progress. However, in order to ensure that you have a series of successful dates so that you have a possible future with your date, you have to keep certain things in mind. You never know, your next date might just be your future wife! 
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