10 personality traits that separate the men from the boys

by Surobhi Banerjee · March 9, 2015

There are two words that the entire human male fraternity despises – ‘Grow up!’ They hate it because they never know when these would be hurled at the poor souls. Their parents always treat them like boys, until some responsibility is to be taken, and then suddenly they are required to man up. Boyish charm works on girls, but then they too want them to be at their best gentleman behavior. So here comes the question – what makes a boy a man? Here are 10 personality traits that separate men from boys.

1. Position in society

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A man creates his own identity and position in society, one that is separate from that of his family. He strives to adhere to his own personality, and is known for the same. A boy however, reaps the fruits of his family’s efforts. He is ignorantly happy to use the status of his family to gain attention, rather than creating his own.

2. The talk

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A boy cannot stop talking about all the big things he is planning to do, or expensive stuff he owns or will own. He can talk non-stop about the plethora of brands he is currently sporting. Whereas a man pays attention to what the people around him are saying. He will be the one wearing an Armani suit, carrying grocery bags into the car with his mother, but not a peep about how expensive the tailored suit is.

3. Competition

Everyone loves healthy competition now and then, be it in school, college or in a work environment. And when participation is in good spirit, the result hardly matters. And while it takes a man to accept defeat graciously and praise the opponent for the good game, boys are busy planning revenge.

4. Mistakes and reaction

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What boys think when they commit a mistake – ‘I-will-deny-any-knowledge-of-it,’ ‘I-will-find-someone-else-to-blame,’ ‘It-was-not-a-mistake-at-all,’ and many other such excuses. What men do when they are at fault – ‘I accept my mistake, and I will try to avoid it in the future. I hope you can forgive me.’ Owning up to faults automatically gives a boy a promotion to manhood.

5. Confidence in manner

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Eavesdropping on some co-workers’ conversations, checking the girlfriend’s/wife’s/partner’s phone for messages and other stuff, thinking that the entire world is out to get you, a smile from your neighbor means he knows something about you – all these are the classic signs of insecurity with a touch of paranoia thrown in. Whereas men, are confident in their way of doing things; they know what they have chosen and happily accept to live with it without any regrets. They do not let opinions of people wander into their own thoughts.

6. Respect

There is no other way to say it properly – boys demand respect, while men command it. When men do something, they do it with a sense of responsibility and duty. Adhering to their commitments and promises, respecting other people, small acts of charity, loyalty are just a few things that men consider to be their way of life. Boys, on the other hand, like to have a drum roll follow them around for even something as small as reaching somewhere on time.

7. Chivalry

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It takes a man to know that waiting in line, holding the door for someone, giving the phone a break while spending time with friends and family are the smallest gestures that leave their mark and are appreciated. Men have a ‘you first’ mantra, while boys have a ‘me first’ agenda.

8. Lady love

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When a boy is with his girl, he is on the lookout for other boys who might be ogling his lady, and lets it affect his behavior with her. However, when a man is out with his lady, his eyes, ears, and all other senses are directed towards her. If there are other eyes on her, he knows that her eyes are only on him. Of course, he also knows how to tackle people violating the boundaries of her respect and dignity, or of any other woman for that matter. That is truly the mark of a man.

9. Inspiration

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Boys have a tendency to follow the trends of someone they like. They love to dress up, own gadgets, use products endorsed by the sportsmen or movie celebrities they admire. Men, however, are above that. They follow their own fashion instincts, create their own unique sense of style, and are inspired by the life stories and struggles of the people they respect.

10. Being real

There is no good way to describe this than saying that ‘Men are real.’ They know what they want, what is expected of them, and try to achieve their goals the best of their abilities. They know that the world and everything it offers is not free or to be taken for granted; they value it. Men have ideals and tenets that they adhere to, no matter what. For boys, the world revolves around them. They neither care nor look at the bigger picture. Words like responsibility and duty do not have any place in their dictionary.

The above 10 traits are in no way a definitive guide to differentiate men from boys. Every individual is unique in his own right, and different factors lead him into taking either a direct route to manhood or a circuitous one.

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Summary